Photo from: News One

Lorenzen Wright, former NBA player, was found dead in a wooded area outside Memphis.

Wright was an all-world Center at the University of Memphis and left school early for the NBA.  Wright played 13 season in the NBA for 5 different teams–most recently the Cleveland Cavaliers.  Reports indicate that he was visiting his ex-wife and children.

It has also been reported that Wright was being sought by armed men, and the Memphis authorities have not ruled out homicide.

Do the Bulls have an advantage? Photo from: Sports Logos

I’ve had the entire weekend to think about the “LeBroncalypse” or the “Lebacle” or whatever you want to call it.  To finish my commentary on that I will say that LeBron assassinated his image on national TV—and it was bloody.

Now we have to consider what will happen when the NBA hits the floor and the Miami Heat are battling for the Eastern Conference crown. Not this team—nor any other team—is pre-ordained to win a title. So, how will the season go?

I think everyone forgot that the Celtics, Magic, Hawks, Bulls, Pacers, etc., are in the Eastern Conference. It’s kind of sad really. There are other teams who can give this Heat team trouble. Not necessarily the Pacers, of course, but the Heat are not the only team in the NBA.

I feel compelled to “call it” now because there is no reason in the world to think that any of the contenders in the East are going to make any more moves. You could claim that the Heat are adding pieces, but those pieces will be cheap. Derek Fisher just turned them down—and he was their best option as a “piece.”

The Chicago Bulls

Photo from: Sports Crazy

The Bulls made a pretty big signing when they brought Carlos Boozer to town from Utah. Boozer was thought to be bait for LeBron to come to Chicago—which would have been a smarter destination—but now they will soldier on with Boozer.

The current Bulls line-up features Derrick Rose, Carlos Boozer, Joakim Noah, and Luol Deng. Now, we can write off Deng because he has done next-to-nothing in the NBA. However, Boozer, Rose, and Noah are killers.

Boozer and Noah will plug up the paint where Chris Bosh would be and just kill him. Chris Bosh isn’t even a superstar and the Heat don’t really have a true Center.

Derrick Rose would be running the Point and scoring. To my knowledge, Derrick Rose is a better player than Heat Point Guard Mario Chalmers. Even if you switch off Guards and have D-Wade cover him you’re leaving Mario Chalmers by himself. Darn!

The Bulls also picked up Kyle Korver from Utah. This adds a “sharpshooting” element to their backcourt that can only be thwarted if Wade is guarding him—leaving Derrick Rose alone with Mario Chalmers.

The only favorable match-up is Luol Deng on LeBron James. LeBron may be a gutless coward, but he’s surely a better player than Luol Deng.

So, if the Bulls and the Heat meet in the East Finals, does Miami expect LeBron to score all their points while running through Deng? I hope not. They won’t get any rebounding down low. They’ll have a hard time shooting from outside.  They’ll be stifled by Chicago’s intensity.

In this instance the “weak link” is Chris Bosh. He’ll stand down in the paint and watch Boozer/Noah run circles around him. Meanwhile, the Heat will get behind and LeBron will have to take over–on Wade’s team.

We don’t think D-Wade will have a problem with that?

Your Boston Celtics

Photo from: Future Ramblings

I’ve spent the last couple years crapping on the Celtics. They’re old, they’re old, and they’re old.  However, they took my beloved Lakers to 6 and a half games before Kobe decided he wanted another ring.

The “sleeping/old” giant was awakened, I think, when the “Stupid 3″—as I will dub them—landed in Miami. When they started acting like they are essentially pre-ordained to win the East—the Celtics took notice.

Kevin Garnett, Paul Pierce, and Ray Allen looked around, grabbed Rajon Rondo, and said to themselves, “Those punks ain’t beatin’ us!”

Look at the match-ups. Bosh on Garnett—Garnett wins. Rondo on Chalmers—Rondo wins. Pierce on LeBron—it’s a push. Pierce is a competitor and LeBron clearly is not.

Wade will play by himself at the “2″ and he will be expected to do all the heavy lifting.

Here, the Celtics reserves will keep them in games. Big Baby, Nate Robinson, and guys like that will fight like hell to keep the Celts in games. How will the Heat respond?

With a bunch of minimum salary guys?  I don’t think so.

Neighbors to the North: The Orlando Magic

Photo from: Bettor's Edge

It’s no secret that the Magic are stinging after missing out on another trip to the finals, but how will they handle the Heat?  Surely the Magic don’t have the kind of talent that the Heat have.

And you would be correct.

The Magic don’t have the kind of talent that the Heat have. However, they have Dwight Howard down low being backed up by Marcin Gortat which equals no rebounding for Miami.

Mickael Pietrus won’t be able to cover LeBron—that very is clear. You would have to switch defenses—again—to have D-Wade cover Jameer Nelson. Doing so leaves lots of space for Vince Carter to get to the basket.

This movement in the backcourt also gives Rashard Lewis perimeter shooting opportunities that he wouldn’t have otherwise. I know that Chris Bosh doesn’t want to play Center, but will he be able to follow Lewis to the perimeter? Probably not.

Again, LeBron will be expected to do all the work—on D-Wade’s team. Anybody who wants to say they can “work it out” isn’t looking at the key matchups.

Where Will They Finish?

Photo from: LA Times

Given that there aren’t many other decent teams in the East it’s conceivable that the Heat might finish in third. Given the relative “strength of schedule” that the Bulls, Celtics, or Magic may face, one of these teams might slip to 4th under the Heat.

However, you can’t convince me that this Miami team, who has matchup issues in a weak Eastern Conference, can tangle with Western Conference teams and consistently win. That puts a damper on your record.

This also means that they will not have a “straight-shot” to the East Finals. They will have to find a way to overcome Bosh’s inability in the paint. They will have to find an effective way to get Wade on the opposing team’s best perimeter guy.

LeBron not only assassinated his image and his legacy, but his chances of winning.  He should have taken my advice.

They will have to find a way to keep LeBron happy without pissing off Wade. Oh, and they’ll have to win games all at the same time. This might have sounded like a cute little fantasy in 2008 at the Olympics when some people claim this “playing together” idea came about.

Remember two things my friends:

1.  At the Olympics—when they were having so much fun—they had NBA All-Stars as reserves.  The best players in the game could come in and give them a rest. Unless all 3 of the “Stupid 3″ in Miami play 48 minutes a night for 82 games—they’ll have problems.  No reserves = going to hell in a handbasket.

2.  When the USA got down to Spain and came very close to losing the Gold Medal Game, who came in and took over?  Kobe—Dean—Bryant.

I rest my case.

Additional Reading on GenXXL:

• Chris Paul Toasts to Knicks: The Next Possible Big 3
• LeBron’s “Pros and Cons” In Going To Miami
• Corrective Exercise For Basketball: How Amar’e Does It

Photo from: Zimbio

This LeBron James “Decision” is going to start a negative trend in the NBA. Today reports surfaced that at Carmelo Anthony’s wedding to La La Vazquez this past weekend, that the idea of another Big 3 may be in the works.

According to the New York Post, Chris Paul made the toast sure to be heard around the NBA: “We’ll Form our own Big 3.”

Paul was referring to himself joining forces with Melo, and the Knicks’ recently signed big free agent Amare Stoudemire.

The Miami Heat experiment dubbed, “Miami Thrice,” that will take place in the NBA 2010-2011 season could change the outlook of basketball teams for long time to come.

I actually believe that the possible big 3 on the Knicks would be more suited to win. Paul gives the team a true point guard and I think Melo is a better end of the game player than Wade or James.

Reports have also Melo signing an extension and staying a member of the Denver Nuggets.

After this past off season, I think Melo would be foolish to sign with the Nuggets and not exercise all of his options like his Team USA buddy, James has recently done.

With Melo having the ability to test the free agency waters next summer he may be able to return home and be on a team that could prevent “James and Company” from winning several titles.

Photo from: Niketalk

I need to open this column with a statement from Cleveland Cavaliers owner Dan Gilbert. It echoes my sentiments exactly and I applaud him for having the balls to say it.  I now count Dan Gilbert as a top-5 owner in sports for this display of strength.

Dear Cleveland, all of Northeast Ohio and Cleveland Cavaliers supporters wherever you may be tonight;

As you now know, our former hero, who grew up in the very region that he deserted this evening, is no longer a Cleveland Cavalier.

This was announced with a several-day, narcissistic, self-promotional build-up culminating with a national TV special of his “decision” unlike anything ever “witnessed” in the history of sports and probably the history of entertainment.

Clearly, this is bitterly disappointing to all of us.

The good news is that the ownership team and the rest of the hard-working, loyal, and driven staff over here at your hometown Cavaliers have not betrayed you nor NEVER will betray you.

There is so much more to tell you about the events of the recent past and our more than exciting future. Over the next several days and weeks, we will be communicating much of that to you.

You simply don’t deserve this kind of cowardly betrayal.

You have given so much and deserve so much more.

In the meantime, I want to make one statement to you tonight: I personally guarantee that the Cleveland Cavaliers will win an NBA Championship before the self-titled former “king” wins one.

You can take it to the bank.

If you thought we were motivated before tonight to bring the hardware to Cleveland, I can tell you that this shameful display of selfishness and betrayal by one of our very own has shifted our “motivation” to previously unknown and previously never experienced levels.

Some people think they should go to heaven but NOT have to die to get there. Sorry, but that’s simply not how it works.

This shocking act of disloyalty from our homegrown “chosen one” sends the exact opposite lesson of what we would want our children to learn. And “who” we would want them to grow up to become.

But the good news is that this heartless and callous action can only serve as the antidote to the so-called “curse” on Cleveland, Ohio.

The self-declared former “King” will be taking the “curse” with him down south. And until he does “right” by Cleveland and Ohio, James (and the town where he plays) will unfortunately own this dreaded spell and bad karma.

Just watch. Sleep well, Cleveland. Tomorrow is a new and much brighter day…

I PROMISE you that our energy, focus, capital, knowledge and experience will be directed at one thing and one thing only:

DELIVERING YOU the championship you have long deserved and is long overdue…

The Positives in Miami

Photo from: Gulfstream

In Miami there are tons of positives. We know that the beaches and nightlife are fantastic. The weather is great all the time.  Heck, I’ve been there at the end of December.  While the rest of the country is freezing its ass off, it’s 85 degrees in Miami.

There are many, many famous people living in Miami.  There are plenty of opportunities for hobnobbing and schmoozing. I remember taking a cruise by Dolphins owner Wayne Huizenga’s house in Ft. Lauderdale—his property is shaped like Florida!

Besides the sightseeing I can’t see how this is positive for anybody but Wade, Bosh, and LeBron. They get to hang out and chill in Miami.

The Heat are run by Pat Riley. He’s won 5 titles as a coach and he’s got a great basketball mind.  Whether he takes these 3 guys plus some “flotsam and jetsam” to a title or not—the Miami “Big 3″ will have fun. That is, until . . .

They See All The Cons

This guy cannot handle the "Miami Thrice" Photo from: NBA.com

The “cons” in Miami are mighty. They are small, but great things can come in small packages. A trio of 28, 26, and 25-year olds are probably not thinking about how they will actually play the game.

When Pat Riley figures out how to cut the ball into threes and hand it out to each of them a third at a time—then they will be able to play well.

Can Mario Chalmers run this team from the point? Probably not. Remember, he hasn’t translated well to the NBA. In fact, even if he was a brilliant, Rajon Rondo-type Point Guard, the “Big 3″ wouldn’t allow him to run the offense.

LeBron will likely become the “Point Forward” in Miami—trying to mimic Hedo Turkoglu with Orlando in the 2009 playoffs. The only problem with that? He’ll get tired of it.

I hope he doesn’t think that letting Wade take passes as a Shooting Guard will open him up for more chances. Wade will take the ball and run straight to the basket.

Now LeBron is annoyed.

LeBron may have more chances to rebound, but wouldn’t that be Chris Bosh‘s job?  Bosh is 7 foot tall.  LeBron, at 6’8″, would need help pulling down rebounds because Bosh has only averaged 9.4 rebounds a game for his career.

So, Bosh doesn’t have the “killer instinct” and he isn’t even a superstar. He’s just lucky that he’s D-Wade’s friend. Let’s scrap Bosh from this conversation. He’ll just be salary the Heat will want to dump near the end of his contract.

Wade v. James For the Ball, the Team

The object of their affection. Photo from: Be Sportier

These two gentlemen will be fighting for the ball while Mario Chalmers stands by and watches. LeBron has this “kingly” image to uphold, but deep-down inside he knows he can’t hack it alone.

So, while he knows internally that he isn’t a winner—he’s outwardly fighting Wade for the ball so he can prove to the world that the move to Miami helped.

He’ll want to win games for Heat to prove to Cleveland, and himself, that the move was right. He’ll fight every instinct he has to become the “Paul Pierce” of this “Big 3″.

Paul Pierce was the slashing-scorer in Boston.  Meanwhile KG was the emotional center and Ray Allen shot daggers all night.

In this scenario LeBron wants to be Pierce and KG combined. He was already hamming it up with his teammates in Cleveland.  He led them emotionally.  He led them on the court, but he couldn’t close the deal. He already tried this and it didn’t work.

The first few times he hams it up on the court Wade will let it go. After a while, Wade will be over it.

They will not only fight for the ball—they will fight for the team. Bosh and Wade are best friends. They’ll go to dinner so Wade can complain about James and his ego. James will sit alone at home and come up with ways to become Jordan.

It’s true that Wade wants to win more titles, but he understands that winning 5 or 6 championships is a near impossibility. It is, most likely, not a reality for him.

LeBron still thinks he can be Jordan. LeBron will be fighting to “carry the mantle” while Wade and Bosh will be talking at dinner about how annoying he is.

That’s a fight for a team. It’s a fight for the team that happens after they spent all night fighting on the court with a bunch of minimum-salary players.

What Have You Done?!

Photo from: Flixster

Here is what LeBron has done. He’s made himself into the second-biggest villain in sports. Art Modell still holds the title from taking the Browns to Baltimore and almost immediately winning the Super Bowl.

However, the reason LeBron is #2 is simple: He picked on poor, old Cleveland just like Art Modell. He took an entire city and ripped their hearts out on national telelvision while sitting at a Boys and Girls Club.

I would argue that LeBron just killed basketball in Cleveland. But, I hope Dan Gilbert proves me wrong and creates a winner in Cleveland. I really do. However, I don’t know how they can do it. I think LeBron drove in the final stake.

LeBron became the guy who killed basketball in Miami because he wants to be famous.  His ego has made him a terrible person in most people’s eyes—even though all he did was change teams.

LeBron created a situation where everybody in the country will be rooting against Miami. In fact, the Heat might have lost some fans because they don’t want to root for an ego-maniac like LeBron. Some people are going to label him a “gutless coward” and write him off.

LeBron has put a bullseye on this team’s back. He has made it impossible for this team to succeed the way they want it to. In fact, I bet they will barely win 50 games.

Without a Center, a functional Point Guard, and, you know, reserves. James just created a team where the “Miami Thrice,” as they are being called, will log about 120 minutes a night. Now multiply by 82 games.

While they’re catching their breath, Dan Gilbert is making it his “mission in life” to make LeBron James suffer. You read the letter at the top, right? He’s beyond pissed.

LeBron didn’t just make himself into the most-hated player in our current sports landscape. He made the Miami Heat, Dwyane Wade, Chris Bosh, and anything “Miami” into the ultimate pariah.

If you thought it was easy to hate the Yankees, or Duke Basketball, or the Cowboys—just try hating the Miami Heat. Hell, you may not even have to try.

You probably already do.

Additional Reading on GenXXL:

• LeBron James’ Decision: The Winner is…
• LeBron James Free Agency Final Four Breakdown
• No Free Agent Tour For LeBron–He’s Missing Out

Photo from: Niketalk

As far as basketball fans are concerned free agency is over. LeBron James has decided to join Dwayne Wade and Chris Bosh in South Beach, playing for the Miami Heat.

In the most serious demeanor I’ve seen him have, James told Jim Grey that he didn’t have an answer until he woke up this morning.

“When I woke up this morning, I knew this was the right decision,” he announced in the ESPN broadcast.

James went on to talk about how excited he is to team up with Wade and Bosh— creating what ESPN continues to describe as a super team.

“I can’t say it was always in the plans, because we didn’t know if this was possible. Those two are both great players, add me to the mix and we’re going to be really good team.”

The ESPN coverage showed a bar in Miami, describing it as “pandemonium would be an understatement.” They also showed an establishment in Cleveland as they let out a groan heard state wide.

When Grey asked James about how he thinks Cavalier fans feel and how he feels about his decision, he gave a great dramatic pause and stated, ”This is a very emotional time for me.”

He talked about how great the Cavaliers organization was to him (owner, Dan Gilbert; GM, John Paxton; and former head coach, Mike Brown) and about all the great times they had as an organization (including fans).

During an interview with Michael Wilbon they showed footage of Cavaliers fans burning his jersey in the streets of Cleveland. It looked as if there was genuine disappointment on James’ face at the sight of his burning jersey burning.

It moved to a lighter mood later in the broadcast when ESPN analyst John Berry asked James about how he would get the number 6 from current point guard Mario Chalmers. For the first time James cracked an actual smile and said, “We’ll work something out.”

An important question that many people have been wondering about was who would take the last shot. James stressed that it is a team and that decision would be up to coach Eric Spoelstra (who I don’t foresee keeping his job) to draw up a play.

Towards the end of the broadcast, it was all about the kids and the different organizations that made this event possible.

One fan got to have his question read on the air: “How long do you think President Obama could hang with you in a game of horse?”

James, a guy known for sinking unthinkable trick shots answered the question nicely saying, “I think he could hang for a bit, he is a lefty. All lefties shoot good.”

James commented on this opportunity and what the future holds now that he is headed to Miami: ”The best opportunity to win, now and into the future. Winning is huge thing for me . . . I’ve done some great things in my 7 years and I want to continue to do that.”

They have to add a lot of minimum contract players, but for right now adding James to the puzzle makes the Miami Heat a very good team.

This statement was released by the New York Knicks and I think the other organizations pleading for his services besides Cleveland feel the same way:

“We are disappointed that LeBron did not choose the New York Knicks, but we respect his decision.”

Check in tomorrow for my colleague The General’s “pros and cons” on LeBron’s move to Miami!

Photo from: Flawless Hustle

I think everyone is excited for the LeBron James free agency escapade to come to end. James makes his decision tonight at 9pm EST on ESPN.

Never in my life have I seen anything like this. So many people making desperate attempts to get a man – and I’ve been to my fair share of strip clubs in Mexico.

This free agency period started off with three big players possibly in search of a new home. With the July 7^th verbal commitments made by Dwayne Wade and Chris Bosh, we’ve seen the second and third largest dominoes to fall in place.

The best rumor circulating is the one where James, Wade, and Bosh all end up playing for the Miami Heat and being coached by Pat Riley – which is possible.

Teams still rumored in the mix along with the Heat are the Chicago Bulls, New York Knicks, and Cleveland Cavaliers. There have been more rumors about where James is going than there are people claiming to have slept with Paris Hilton.

I personally think that the New Jersey Nets are the second best landing spot of James. They’re probably going to move to New York and it’s far enough away from Delonte West.

Let’s take a look at all four realistic destinations and decide which is the best fit for Lebron.

Wanna Be Like Mike

Photo from: Panache Report

With the addition of Carlos Boozer, the Bulls have become the best landing spot for James.

Point guard Derrick Rose, center Joakim Noah and highly over rated forward/guard Luol Deng makes for one of the top teams in the Eastern Conference – if not the NBA.

The biggest problem I see with James signing with the Bulls is the Michael Jordan comparisons. James is not now, nor will he ever be Jordan. Playing in Jordan’s old stomping ground will only make these comparisons worse.

The other problem with going to Chicago is they’ve recently hired head coachTom Thibodeau and he reminds me of Mike Brown. He doesn’t have enough of a resume to stand up to James and let him know that this is a team, not a circus. This will most likely lead to more dancing and disappointment just at a different location in the Midwest.

However, after James gets another solid coach fired, he’ll end up attracting a guy that will lead this highly talented team to the promise land.

The Big Sour Apple

Photo from: Using Virtual Paper

In theory, this would be the best place for him to land from a marketing standpoint. He can’t go to L.A. because that is Kobe Bryant country and who wants to play for the Los Angeles Clippers. What the hell is a Clipper anyway?

The league would love for James to be in New York and revive a struggling franchise in a major market. I just don’t think between the Amare Stoudemire signing, head coach Mike D’Antoni, and the team’s “no defense” attitude, that is a place where he wants to be.

Yes, the Knicks would be a playoff team with James, but they wouldn’t be any better than the Cleveland team he would be leaving — not mention he would be leaving millions in guaranteed money to go and be crucified on the back page of the New Yorker every day.

New York is, hands down, a baseball town. And, no one is more loved there than the Yankees and their beloved Derek Jeter.

This whole mess started with King James-to-NY-2010 posters. How funny is it going to be when the Knicks fans wake up tomorrow and realize they only got a good player with sweet goggles.

Is 3 the Magic Number

Photo from: The Sky Hook

I’m not entirely convinced that this supposed “Big 3” would work out. The reason it worked out for the Boston Celtics was because you had three aging, desperate, veterans who understood how precious their time was.

These three are in the prime of their careers and anything short of winning a championship would not be worth sacrificing career numbers. All of these guys claim to be unselfish, but only at the cost of winning.

I do think they could win a title or two in their time together, but it doesn’t mesh as well as James, Boozer and Rose. If you throw a shooter/defender into the Bulls mix you’re looking at the perfect distribution. The Heat distribution would look more like squirrels fighting over a nut.

The other thing I don’t like about this possible scenario is, if this works, it starts a negative trend in the NBA.  Then we could have Chris Paul headed to the Lakers with Kobe and Pau Gasol and Deron Williams and Carmelo Anthony headed to Orland to play with Dwight Howard.

ESPN’s Chris Broussard reported that several sources told him late last night James is headed to Miami. I think this is a strong possibility, but I don’t like what it could do to the league.

Home Is Where the Fart Is

Photo from: ENFIA

If James leaves Cleveland, that place is going to stink worse than a Dutch-oven from Rosie O’Donnell.

I’m not a Cavs fan, but I am a LeBron James fan. This entire time I never thought he was going to leave until I heard that Miami could possibly sign all three. Then I heard he was doing his puppet show in Connecticut and the answer would be given in the first 10 minutes.

The fact that he is going to give the answer the question on everyone’s mind in the first 10 minutes of a show dedicated to himself tells me that he needs some time to explain decision.

I think Jim Gray is going to ask him many questions, providing him a chance to console the fans of Cleveland by explaining why the one player in the league who can most identify with their heartbreak is only going to add more to it.

My heart says James will do the right thing and stay in Cleveland. My mind says he’d be crazy to stay on a team that can’t afford to add anyone else and has failed after having the best record in the league for consecutive seasons.

If James were going to stay in Cleveland, would he really need to fly all the way to Greenwich, Connecticut to make this announcement? I doubt it.

I do believe that he tried to recruit another big man to come to Cleveland and they declined. Bosh wanted the city and Boozer already went running from Cleveland once.

I have a feeling that tonight James will drop a big stink bomb on the city of Cleveland. When I look at the possibilities, I really can’t blame him.

It's a high-time for these players, but not necessarily for the teams that draft them. Photo from: Bleacher Report

The NBA Draft came and went last night at Madison Square Garden without much depth. The fans in attendance booed David Stern mercilessly, John Wall went #1, and some teams attempted to repeat past failures.

There are always draft picks that don’t make any sense, but they are usually confined to teams drafting European players we’ve never heard of. If you’re making a bad pick outside of that you’re messing with specters of your own past.

In the NBA, it seems that history repeats itself. Certain teams are always pretty good, and certain teams always make bad choices. Just think about how history repeats itself.

Since 1980, only 8 franchises have won the NBA championship: L.A., Boston, Detroit, Chicago, San Antonio, Philly, Miami, and Houston. You could say that Miami and Philly won by luck, but they really won with smart personnel moves.

Miami drafted D-Wade in 2003, Philly made a move for Dr. J. in the 80′s, and Houston brought in Clyde Drexler to play with Hakeem. Those are the smart teams—we’ll be talking about the dumb ones today. The teams who never seem to get out of their own way.

There are four draft picks that really stand out as ill-advised, stupid, and/or crack-smoking. You will see the parallels to “bad history.” You may want to sit down—this could make you sick.

Also, this column is not intended for children—they shouldn’t have to witness this carnage.

John Wall, #1 to Washington

Photo from: News Observer

I asked my distinguished colleague, Tony Tucker, if he was doing his own draft review. Since he was in “baseball mode” I figured I’d go full-speed-ahead with this piece.

However, before I signed off, he chimed in, “don’t think wall is a great 1st pk btw.” Well, that’s all I needed to hear. I already didn’t like Wall as the #1 overall pick.

John Wall comes in as a highly touted point guard to a team that already has a guy at the point. Gilbert Arenas, injuries and all, has been running this team for quite a while. The return of Arenas will only spark a “battle for the ball.”

Even if Arenas begs for a trade there may not be a team in the league who will—or can—take him. Since he’s due a ton of money, the Wizards have to play him.

Now you have a gun-toting lunatic (Arenas) giving your brand new #1 (Wall) a workout every night trying to get the ball. This team will be in immediate “identity crisis mode.” Is Wall running the show? Is Arenas running the show even though he wants to leave?

Wizards General Manager, Ted Leonsis, isn’t about trading Arenas:

“We’re not actively trading him. But I would ask you to put yourself in another general manager’s shoes. He was injured for two years and suspended for a year and he’s a max [contract] player. If you were another team’s general manager, would you be trading for Gilbert Arenas right now?”

I would if it meant saving my new #1 pick in John Wall!

Imagine the nightly routine: Arenas comes out and hogs the ball. Flip [Saunders] tells Arenas to hand the ball over the Wall. Wall runs the show for a while, but has no good players to distribute the ball to. Arenas gets frustrated and takes the ball back. Wizards lose.

Even if the Wizards could trade Gilbert Arenas, there’s no one for John Wall to get the ball to.  He’ll spend every game trying to do it by himself—at age 19.

Washington would have been better off drafting DeMarcus Cousins. Asking Cousins to put his back to the basket every night makes more sense than drafting a young Point Guard and giving him nothing to work with.

Do these people not watch Cleveland basketball?  This is LeBron‘s problem!  He has nothing around him. Why else are we on “Lebron Watch?” Don’t make this your problem too!

Wesley Johnson, #4 to Minnesota

It isn't going to be this easy in the NBA. Photo from: NY Daily News

I feel like history is destined to repeat itself in Minnesota. Wesley Johnson is a nice small forward from Syracuse. Have you noticed his build? How slim he is compared to other Forwards?

I remember when Kevin Garnett was drafted by Minnesota—back in the dark ages—and he was this little, skinny wonder. In fact, Garnett is still pretty slim for his position.

Garnett had one good season in Minnesota when the team was stacked. Garnett went to Boston, was pulled along by Ray Allen and Paul Pierce, then broke down physically.

Wesley Johnson looks to be “Kevin Garnett, Jr.”  Granted, there are better players in Minnesota than there were when Garnett came out. Wayne Ellington, Corey Brewer, Al Jefferson, Kevin Love and Jonny Flynn.

We know that Wesley Johnson won’t be asked to play out of position as Garnett was forced to at times. However, I can’t look past the fact that the Sixers drafted a 6’7″ guard—in Evan Turner—and Minnesota took a 6’8″ small forward.

A highly drafted, undersized, slender player got the T-Wolves one good season. After 10 years they traded Garnett and gave up—totally depleted.

I think Wesley Johnson could be a great player, but not unless he gains 50 lbs. Why won’t Minnesota look at their history and go for a big guy? “Skinny Garnett” didn’t help. Why would “Skinny Johnson” help?

They too could have had DeMarcus Cousins backing up to the basket every night. Now they have to pray that a 6’7″, 206 lb. Johnson can guard a 6’8″, 280 lb. LeBron a couple times a year.

Cole Aldrich, #11 to New Orleans

Say bye-bye to CP3--the Aldrich pick won't do it. Photo from: Hoop Angle

Cole Aldrich is that blonde, white kid from Kansas.  He pretty much stands out on any basketball court.  He’s big, but he’s slow. He’s a hard-worker with a lot of energy, but he doesn’t seem to be NBA-ready.

Cole Aldrich has some “upside” but he isn’t going to come in on “day one” and make a huge difference.  He’s a project, and that’s the last thing the Hornets need.

Chris Paul told ESPN’s Chris Broussard:

“My first choice is to be in New Orleans.  I just want to make sure we’re committed to winning. If we’re not committed to winning and trying to get better so we can contend with the Lakers, the Celtics and all these other top teams, then I’m open to being traded.”

Based on the choice of Cole Aldrich, I’d say it’s time to start waving “bye-bye” to CP3. Aldrich won’t match up with Bynum, Gasol, Odom, Perkins, Howard or Stoudamire. Aldrich is a project.

Chris Paul even told Broussard:

“I’m fine with staying in New Orleans, but I want to make sure we’re committed to winning. I don’t want to rebuild. I want to win now. It’s nothing personal against the city. I love that city. But my biggest thing is winning.”

Since Aldrich isn’t winning any battles inside, I’d say it’s time to rebuild the Hornets—without Chris Paul.

Damion Jones, Tibor Pleiss, Jordan Crawford,# 24 to Atlanta

This stop-gap isn't big enough--even if he dunked on LeBron. Photo from: Xavier U.

Damion Jones is a nice small forward, and he could be a pretty good player in the NBA. The only problem with that—the Hawks have like 4,000 forwards on their team already.

They have to trot out Marvin Williams and pretend he’s a starter. Al Horford is an undersized center who ends up playing out of position because he’s really a power forward.

The Hawks have a serious need for a big-guy.  They don’t draft very well—historically—but at least they could try to draft a big-man. Just pick a really tall dude.

Well, they heard the universe tell them, “You don’t want Damion Jones.” They traded Jones’ draft-rights to the Nets for Center Tibor Pleiss and Guard Jordan Crawford.

It’s great!  They finally picked up a big-man!

Actually, they sent Pleiss’ draft-rights to Oklahoma City for cash considerations.  Now they have more money to either re-sign Joe Johnson or bring in veterans—but no big-men.

Pleiss was a smart move—they need a large man to occupy the middle. This way Al Horford could play power forward—his natural position in the NBA. Now Al Horford has to spend another season standing in a gap he can’t fill.

Jordan Crawford is just a stop-gap in case Joe Johnson leaves. He’s a nice little shooting guard at 6’4″ from Xavier, but there’s no guarantee he’ll want the ball in clutch moments.  Plus, he won’t have another chance to dunk on LeBron.

With Mike Bibby aging and the rest of the backcourt playing off the bench, there’s no way Jordan Crawford can learn how to play in the NBA. If he isn’t starting at the beginning of the season, it will get ugly.

That means Jamal Crawford might be starting—and we all know that starting Jamal Crawford is not in the Hawks’ vocabulary.

While Pleiss might have taken some pressure off Al Horford, who would feed “Big Al” the ball? The Hawks have once again failed to answer that question. Jeff Teague wasn’t the answer last year, and Mike Bibby is older than dirt.

If Joe Johnson is re-signed then Jeff Teague and Jordan Crawford will be sitting on the bench. That’s two 1st-rounders on the bench. Their lack of true “impact” players in the backcourt will only make the transition to new Head Coach Larry Drew harder.

Rick Sund—you just became Billy Knight 2.0, and it’s too late to take it back. Your team’s lack of size will kill it again in 2010-2011.

At least you aren’t the Hornets, Wizards, or Timberwolves . . .

Additional Reading on GenXXL:

• Dwight Howard’s Workout: From Skinny to Superman
• Sports Image Sabotage 101
• NBA: 2010 Anti-Awards

Photo from: Dime Mag

Corrective Exercise is a recent trend in fitness that doesn’t focus solely on “getting in shape” or “getting big.” The program is much more specific and can lead to great gains.

Because folks like Amar’e Stoudemire are pretty big dudes, it makes sense to bring up any training program he undertakes. However, since corrective exercise can work for anyone,  we’ll also talk about the program as a whole.

Corrective Exercise is focused. Former Mr. Universe Dave Draper explains that it “broadly refers to specific exercise or stretches to target a defect in a person’s physical movement.” Corrective Exercise aims to “correct” the situation.

Some exercises are great for basketball players—especially those who are huge, like Amar’e—and those exercises may also benefit anyone who is looking to get big. Plus, your “pick up” game might improve as well!

You can take yourself through a corrective program or get “tested” by a professional trainer. The goal is to balance your body and put yourself on firm footing to have the symmetry you’ve been looking for.

As opposed to “pushing through” and “maximizing reps”, Corrective Exercise wants to balance your body.  It is aimed at finding deficiencies in certain muscle groups and bringing them up to par.

Amar’e Undergoes a Test

Photo from: Oddjack

Phoenix Suns Head Strength and Conditioning Coach Erik Phillips diagnosed Amar’e in a unique way.  He had Amar’e do a squat with his arms overhead.  Then he had Amar’e do a one-legged squat with his hands on his hips on each side.

The purpose of this test is to get multiple photographs from as many angles as possible. Comparison of these photographs will give you—or your trainer—an idea of how balanced your body is.  Photographs of the body in motion will reveal deficiencies that the naked eye will never catch.

The corrective exercises prescribed are designed to balance “overworked” and “under-worked” muscles. If you do work that over-emphasizes your right side then your right arm will be stronger than your left. If you’re left-handed, then the opposite may be true. The test will tell the tale.

Even though the test is very short it tells you everything you need to know.  Careful scrutiny of the photographs will constantly reveal new areas that you can work on–assuring that you’ll never get bored.

With Amar’e the test results were very specific.

Arm Overhead Squat:

Phillips observed that Amar’e’s feet turned out, his knees moved outward, and he leaned forward quite a bit. Those tendencies can be translated into a diagnoses and routine to correct the imbalance.

Because his feet and knees turned out, the deficiency was diagnosed as imbalanced abductors.  When Amar’e was leaning forward, the deficiency was diagnosed as weak glutes/erectors.

During a single-leg squat, Amar’e leaned forward again and his knees moved inward. Phillips diagnosed that as tight abductors and a lack of hip stabilization.

Phillips has given a nice—and basic—method of testing ourselves, but what do you do next?

Corrective Exercises for Basketball

Photo from: Alex Allan Integrated

This a selection of exercises that Erik Phillips designed to “correct” Amar’e Stoudemire’s imbalance.  However, because many of the deficiencies are common among basketball players, they might help you too!

Calf Complex
Sit on the floor with a foam roller under your calf.  Roll up and down the muscle to release tension.

Adductor Complex
Lie on your stomach and place your leg out to the side. Place the roller underneath your leg and roll from knee to groin. Exercise both legs in like manner.

Piriformis Stretch
Lie on your back, and bend your right leg to cross it over your left leg. Place your left hand on the outside of right knee and slowly pull your right leg towards your left shoulder. Do the exercise slowly until you feel it in your glutes—then change sides.

Kneeling Flexor Stretch
Kneel on your right knee and place your left leg flat on the floor. Tighten up and rotate your pelvis until you feel tension. Next, you can raise one arm and rotate your torso. Rotate back and then rotate to your other side.

Standing Hamstring Stretch
Place your right foot on a chair or step in front of you. Angle it toward left leg and lean forward until you feel tension in your hamstring. Rinse and repeat!

Remember, these exercises don’t take long to do, but they will help balance your muscles. Test yourself every now and then to make sure you’re making progress. Corrective exercises should nearly eliminate your deficiencies.

It’s true that these stretches and exercises were “prescribed” to Amar’e, but anybody can do them and see some benefit.  Corrective exercise is the next wave of fitness—so try some popular ones yourself.

Some Popular—and Common—Corrective Exercises

Photo from: Spider Sports

Gluteal Roll
Sit with your butt directly on the foam roller. Place one leg on your other knee. Roll onto your glutes until you find a tender spot. Keep rolling in the tender area to relieve tension. Change sides and repeat.

Stability Ball Squat
Place a stability ball against the wall and lean against it with your mid-back. Squat down—keeping your knees over your ankles. Flex your glutes and stand up until your knees and hips are straight.  You’re simply rolling the ball up and down the wall.

Single-Leg Balance Reach
Stand on one leg. Draw your abs in and extend your raised leg backwards. Tighten your glutes, quad and calf. Hold it for two seconds—then bring your foot back to your body.

Push-up with Rotation
Do a push-up. When you get to the top of the push-up, raise one arm up in the air. Bring your arm back down and complete the push-up. Alternate arms as you complete a series of 10 to 20 push-ups.

Any of these corrective exercises could be beneficial to you, whether you play basketball or bodybuild.  Symmetry is key to the effectiveness of your workouts. When you “correct” your body and take the pressure off one side, you’ll feel less tension.

Less tension equals better workouts. Better workouts equal better results. Better results are what we’re hoping for you!

Additional Reading on GenXXL:

• Dwight Howard’s Workout: From Skinny to Superman
• Breaking Down Men’s Fitness: “25 Ways to Get Stronger Now”
• Is CrossFit Fit For You?

Photo from: Sports Guru

LeBron James has determined that he will not go on a “free agent tour” when the NBA free agency window opens on July 1. It would be very easy for him to bask in the sunlight and enjoy all the fun and perks a “tour” would bring.

Personally, I think it’s pretty selfish to have the teams come out on his terms. Besides the fact that it’s a waste of resources for a team to leave their offices to hold an “interview” — the “front” is too easy.

LeBron has claimed that he wants to “talk basketball” and avoid all the hoopla that a “recruiting trip” would have. That sounds nice, but he can only truly be the center of attention if everyone is coming to him.

When teams start meeting LeBron in Akron, Ohio — starting July 1 — they’ll have left behind the “red carpet.” However, they will be without the essential questions that LeBron needs answered.

What questions are those?

It Won’t Be “Crockett And Tubbs” In Miami

Photo from: Minyanville

The Heat hadn’t planned any parties or celebrations for LeBron, but why would they? They have South Beach; it’s 85 degrees all the time; it never rains, and he can go get a tattoo on TV.

Plus, he could have a chance to play with Dwyane Wade. Batman and Robin? Starksy and Hutch?  Crockett and Tubbs?

Besides the fact that neither one of these guys could swing the white jacket with the rolled sleeves, I think this is a bad idea. It sound nice — in theory — but it’s a bad idea.

If LeBron went down to Miami and walked through the Heat’s practice facility long enough to run into, say, Udonis Haslem, he’d probably learn something.  Haslem couldn’t like when LeBron asked, “How’s it playing with D-Wade?”

Haslem would have to be honest.  “Umm, when we get behind D-Wade starts pushing too hard.  It’s like playing with 2005-2008 Kobe.”

Just look at Wade’s priorities when he told J.A. Adande his free-agency intentions:

“It’s going to be fit with me first. I’ve made that very clear. Do I want to leave? Nope. Mmm-hmm. I want to be in Miami. That’s where it starts.”

I bet that LeBron’s conversation with Haslem would conclude with, “D doesn’t want you to have the ball.  Just think about it, man.” It would leave LeBron with a sour taste, but it would be honest.

Heat President, Pat Riley, is going to travel to Akron to meet with LeBron, but he won’t mention D-Wade’s selfish tendencies. The closest thing LeBron will hear to honesty is Riley talking about coaching — an allusion to speculation that Riley will fire Erik Spoelstra and take the bench.

We know it can’t be “Crockett and Tubbs” in Miami when there’s only one ball. Although I would love the chance to laugh at LeBron and Wade trying to share the ball — it’s a bad idea.  Imagine Don Johnson sharing a gun with Phillip Michael Thomas.

If you’re a Heat fan and you want to bang your head against the wall — beg for LeBron. If you want to win — beg for Chris Bosh.

New York, New York–Or Not

Photo from: Tony Sports

The Knicks had a lavish, extravagant party planned for LeBron when the free-agency period started July 1. That party has been canceled.  LeBron isn’t going on a “tour” and the Knicks just lost their best chance to sign him.

The only way to get a camera-hog/ego-maniac like LeBron to appreciate New York is to get him in the city. Spotting him in a Yankees cap just isn’t enough.

What would LeBron learn if he were to travel all the way to Manhattan? Well, assuming he talks to coaches, he would learn that Mike D’Antoni is not “all that.”

D’Antoni had Steve Nash fall in his lap in Phoenix. Nash made him look good. D’Antoni ran to the Knicks for the money. The Knicks still suck and the Suns, sans-D’Antoni, beat the Spurs in the playoffs.

Deep down inside we all know that LeBron would take one look at Mike D’Antoni and think, “I’ll have to get this guy fired.” For someone who can’t close a 2nd-round playoff series — that’s too much work.

LeBron’s “inner-circle” has surely told him that the Knicks can afford two “max contracts.” This means he can get a “Pippen to his Jordan” like Chris Bosh or Joe Johnson in New York.

As much as I’ve crapped on LeBron for being selfish and child-like, I think he craves a coach befitting his skill. He watched the Lakers win championship #5 of the 21st Century under Phil Jackson.

LeBron is stubborn, but he ain’t stupid. He wants to be “all that” and knows he can’t be without a great coach. Instead of getting the same look of ignorance he got from Mike Brown, he’ll just get a sales pitch from Donnie Walsh — not a guarantee.

The closest thing to a guarantee comes from Walt Frazier — a Knicks demi-god: 

“I think LeBron would gain in stature by coming to the Knicks. I think if he signed with the Knicks, he’d be right up there with Kobe. By being in L.A. and playing for the Lakers and winning four titles already, I think Kobe is above LeBron. I think playing in L.A., in that market, does that for him. But I think coming to New York would help LeBron get to be on Kobe’s level.”

The party would have been fun, the media craze would have been nice, but the conversation afterward would have sent LeBron running. D’Antoni just isn’t enough. New York — be glad that you didn’t get your hopes up!

The Winds Are Blowing Towards Chicago

Photo from: Steve Bumbaugh

Chicago didn’t have any celebrations planned. There’s no fanfare surrounding the Bulls. They won six championships in ’90s that are surrounded by pure mediocrity. Basically, it’s Jordan, then everybody else.

If LeBron wants to be the “new Jordan” then there’s no better place to “summit” Jordan than Chicago. However, he’s not going to visit Chicago — as far as we know — so he’s missing out.

Joakim Noah could tell him, “Listen man, nobody wants to win a championship as bad as me.  I was the MOP of the Final Four man. We can do this man.” Noah can appeal to LeBron with his genuine competitive fire — which, I believe, is stronger than LeBron’s.

Derrick Rose can tell LeBron, “Listen, I feed you the ball and we win. You don’t have to hog it all game.  Just give me the ball.  Give me.  Give me the ball, LeBron, and we can do this.”

LeBron can have his Pippen (Rose) and his Kukoc/Longley/Grant/energy-guy (Noah) and they can crush people. Plus, the Bulls just hired Tom Thibodeau away from Boston to be their next Head Coach.

Now he can play with winners, be coached by a winner and not have to carry the load every night. LeBron has this one figured out because the Daily Herald reported that LeBron “placed a call…to Derrick Rose.” He knows the potential in Chicago–it’s so obvious.

LeBron doesn’t need a party or even an “official visit” to figure this one out.

He wants to be famous really bad. In fact, I still think fame is “1A” whereas winning is “1B,” but LeBron’s getting some good advice. He can be more than Jordan — he can be the guy who resurrected the Bulls if he wins in Chicago.

That’s not the “second man” — that’s the “second coming.”

He’s Leaving Cleveland

For Chicago.

Photo from: djibnet

In the end, I really think LeBron’s people will turn his head towards Chicago and tell him to pick up shop and run there. There’s no reason not to, and all the pieces are in place. You can’t argue it.

Scottie Pippen could only speak out of fear of being “dethroned:”

“I don’t know if LeBron James fits with the Chicago Bulls. I don’t know if I want Derrick Rose to give the ball up and let LeBron run the show. There are some great free agents out there.  For me, you have to have the right fit. You just can’t go and get the best player. You got to have chemistry in this game.”

New York could roll out 4000 red carpets, but that won’t make Mike D’Antoni a good coach. Miami can give him 10,000 strippers on loan, and that won’t make him “play nice” with D-Wade, but nothing gives him a chance to be “it” like Chicago does.

All Chicago has to do is remind him whose statue is outside the United Center — and ask him if he wants one too. Scottie knows that — and that’s why he’s afraid.

Afraid LeBron can rewrite the Bulls’ history books.

Additional Reading on GenXXL:

• Phil Jackson Tells Us How He Feels—Or So We Think
• NBA: You Fired Your Coach? For What?
• NBA Gossip: Does LeBron Have A Way “Out” Of Cleveland?

Photo by: How Stuff Works

Image is a big deal in sports. The NFL works tirelessly to make sure its image is squeaky clean (to no avail).

NBA stars want to have “street cred” — but not too much. NHL players want to be tough. Baseball players want everyone to think they work hard — even when they don’t.

Here are the image levels:

1. Players who want to look a certain way — and hope it works.

2. The leagues’ and owners’ desire to NOT look like “fat cats” even — though they are.

3. The secret society of people who work to destroy images, “slowly, but surely.”

It’s this third level of image I want to talk about. Sports is filled with beefs and arguments — confrontations — locker room fist fights. Sports has every kind of anger you can imagine.

Where does all this anger and confrontation come from? Does it come from some inner desire for all men to compare penis size?  That’s part of it, but I think it’s even bigger than that.

This goes far beyond Kobe telling the cops in Colorado that Shaq had women on the side. This is much bigger than Eric Mangini starting the “SpyGate” investigation.

This is even bigger than a near gunfight in the Washington Wizards locker room.

People Work Very Hard to Make Anger and Confrontation Happen

Photo from: The Telegraph

I firmly believe that there are people in the NFL — team employees, hangers-on, groupies, and such — who make it their entire job to create trouble.

This secret society — which I will refer to as SNITCH (The Society Now Intentionally Titled to Create Hostility) — exists to make life difficult for certain teams and players.

SNITCH is a band of people who find the ears of star players. Some of them have the confidence of owners and executives.  Others simply watch from a distance — playing an advanced version of “Telephone.”

SNITCH knows that players and owners have a lot of information coming to them, and that information is rarely filtered. Given the large volume of information it’s easy to “hide” inside the data stream.

As information flows towards players and owners, people are either assigned, or they choose, to make a play for someone’s attention. Then, they start a rumor, hint at a rumor or make light of something that should be private.

Many teams like to handle their business “in house.”  Those few teams are immune to SNITCH. Basically, in a place like New England or New York, you “keep it to yourself or die.”

Remember Goodfellas? Robert DeNiro tells a young Ray Liotta, you “don’t say a word.” Nobody likes a rat.

SNITCH avoids these teams like the plague. They look for easy targets. Targets like…

Kenyon Martin and Carmelo Anthony

Photo from: Flylip

An “insider” told Mediatakeout.com that Kenyon Martin and his rapper girlfriend, Trina, are having a “commitment ceremony” on the same day as Carmelo Anthony’s wedding.

First, K-Mart says that this is completely untrue, “There is no truth to recent media reports about me having a commitment ceremony on July 10, 2010, or any other date. I will be attending my teammate’s wedding on July 10, 2010.”

He even went on to drive the point home. “I have not responded to several other untrue claims about me on the Internet, but I felt I had no choice because this was involving my teammate’s wedding date.”

Now, this has nothing to do with the playoffs since the Nuggets have long since been eliminated. This has to do with direct conflict between Melo and K-Mart.

If you’re a SNITCH operative you run this rumor out there hoping that a jumpy K-Mart will hold a grudge against Melo for dragging him into the media with his wedding.

You’re also hoping that Melo will stop trusting K-Mart because — he already knows K-Mart is crazy, and K-Mart messed with his wedding.

The mission was simple. Find two teammates who could easily “beef.” Choose a team with a sick head coach — George Karl has cancer — for added effect.

It’s bound to start something.

What About LeBron’s Mom?

Photo from: Technorati

The first thing I heard about the rumored affair involving LeBron James’ mom and Delonte West was on the radio. The “2 Live Stews” — syndicated on Sporting News out of Atlanta’s 790 The Zone – -were joking about Delonte West being at LeBron’s house.

I found the idea of Delonte cooking eggs in the nude in LeBron’s kitchen especially funny, but it’s all a rumor. I think SNITCH is behind this.

LeBron already distrusts most of his team. He’s upset that Shaq and Antawn messed everything up by not contributing enough to a title run.

If I’m a SNITCH operative, I’m totally running with this one, but I’m telling someone with the Cavs. Let LeBron find out about it the same time a disgruntled teammate goes to the press.

The rumors came out during the Eastern Conference Semi-Finals. Do we think this effected LeBron’s play? He certainly wasn’t “all there” during Games 5 and 6 against Boston.

Perhaps a SNITCH operative working for the Celtics started this one? It’s either that, or Shaq — because Shaq’s an asshole. But I think it’s a Boston SNITCH agent.

Whether the rumors are completely untrue or not — there’s no way LeBron could have played well wondering if his mom was boinking Delonte West.

Well played SNITCH — well played.

What are the Implications?

Photo from: swrnn.com

LeBron James missed out on making the NBA Finals because he was distracted by a SNITCH rumor? The Nuggets fall apart around their cancer-stricken coach because Melo and K-Mart are beefing over wedding dates?

The Kobe/Shaq Lakers crumbled after a SNITCH agent leaked Kobe’s comments to the Colorado police — causing Shaq to ask Kobe.“Tell me how my ass taste.”

The Pittsburgh Steelers got ruined when a SNITCH agent suggested to Ocmulgee District Attorney, Fred Bright, that leaking facts to the press was a good idea.

We hear rumors and they go in one ear and out the other, but these players and owners take everything to heart. Each one is just a mind ready to inhabit with scandalous talk. That’s how SNITCH operates.

Can you go through your team’s history and find a time when you thought your team just got screwed — and now you realize SNITCH was at work? I know I can…

But I won’t tell. I’m already looking over my shoulder. Does SNITCH know where I live?  I’ve said too much!t.

Additional Reading on GenXXL

• NBA: You Fired Your Coach?  For What?
• Boston’s “Three Amigos” Hate Rajon Rondo
• Who’s Got it Worse?  Cleveland or Salt Lake City?

Somewhere between 2004 and his current dominance “inside the paint,” he managed to put on weight and sculpt his body. How else could he handle the rigors of playing “inside” in the NBA. He is the 2-time defending NBA “Defensive Player of the Year” after all.

You can’t achieve that as the scrawny kid.

Dwight does many different exercises and routines that have helped take him to the top.  Highlighting some of his routines and preferred exercises should give us insight into how he put muscle on such a thin frame.

Some guys are naturally big and just need to build muscle—Dwight Howard was tiny and needed to build a whole body!  What’s his secret?

Dwight’s Routine in the Gym

Photo by Jason Lengstorf

Dwight works out with Orlando Magic strength coach, Joe Rogowski.  He doesn’t always train at home, and when he is at the Magic’s practice facility, he works out with Rogowski.

If you have a personal trainer or you belong to a gym, these are some great exercises for you. You can put your own program together or you can use a personal trainer to help you incorporate exercises like those Dwight does with Rogowski.

These are a few “basic” gym exercises, but Rogowski has training tips to go along with the exercise to make it more effective. A “bench press” is just a bench press—but you can also add onto the move.

Bench Press

Hold the bar with your arms as wide apart as you can and find a spotter! Laying on your back and lifting weights without a spotter is about the worst idea ever.

Rogowski says you should not arch your back, but keep your core activated during the press.  Dwight does what they call a “pyramid rep scheme” to increase muscle gain.

For the “pyramid” start with the lightest weight and do 10 reps, then increase the weight and do 8 reps. Continue until you are doing your heaviest weight at only 2 reps. You should feel comfortable with the weight, but you’re still pushing yourself by the end.

Feed the meathead in you already!

Lat Pulldown

Here you’re supposed to sit on the Lat Pulldown Machine and hold the bar wider than shoulder width. Pull the bar down to your upper chest only and then let it rise until your arms are straight again.

Because the exercise moves slowly—and it’s a good rebounding exercise for your basketball guy—you can do 2-4 sets of 10-12 pulldowns. Remember to keep good posture—don’t slouch as you pull the bar down.

Leg Press

Hop on the Leg Press Machine with your feet slightly wider than your hips. This one is great for all the muscles around your hips, knees, and ankles. Rogowski calls it a “multi-joint” exercise.

Lower the weight on the machine with legs slowly for 3-4 reps—in 6-8 sets of reps total. That may seem like a lot of weight, but your joints will thank you when all the muscles surrounding them are stronger.

These exercises and this routine might seem extreme—or you might not have a gym handy.  Well, Dwight also works out at home.

Dwight’s Home Workout

Nobody, regardless of how much money they make, wants to be at the gym all the time.  Sure, you could just put a gym in your house if you’re a millionaire, but sometimes it’s better to stay simple. This sampling of home routines come from Dwight’s trainer, Brian Meyer.

You can do these exercises at home on a rainy day, during a blizzard, or whenever you just don’t want to leave the house. Yes, even NBA superstars “stay their ass at home”—as Dennis Scott says. It keeps you out of trouble!

Crossover Push-Ups

It is recommended that you start this exercise with your hands on the flat side of a weight plate. Honestly, you could use anything that won’t move and provides a couple inches of elevation. Try a book, some towels, or even an extra tile from your kitchen remodel!

Start in proper push-up position with your back completely straight—no butts up in the air here!  Your left hand is on the plate and your right hand is on the floor. Complete a push-up.

Now, push off and fire yourself to the other side—now your left hand is on the floor and your right hand on the plate. Rinse and repeat!  How many push-ups can you do?  20-25 is a good set for your arms.

One-Legged Squats with Dumbbells

Got a couple dumbbells at home? Got a couple milk jugs?  Times are tough and you can do this with any weight that you promise not to drop on your foot!

Lower the weight to the floor without arching your back. It should feel as though you’re setting the weight on the floor—only you stand back up and continue.

10-20 reps on each leg should do the trick.

Squat Plus a Push-Up

You have no equipment at home. You don’t belong to a gym. You need something. Then perhaps you should combine squats and push-ups.  Actually, this exercise is called a “burpee.”

From a standing position squat down. The squat alone works some of your lower body. Now place your hands on the floor and throw your legs behind you.

You should be in a push-up position. Back straight—no butts up here—and do a push-up.  Jump your feet back under you and stand.

There are multiple ways to perform a burpee, but if we’ve learned anything, we’ve learned that intensity helps. Don’t “tap dance” around this exercise. You’ve got to be “on the move” to exert yourself during burpees.

Dwight Is a Motivator

Photo by Keith Allison

Instead of just staring up at him and asking, “How’d you get so big” or “How’s the weather up there,” you could very easily take Dwight’s story and program as a motivator. If he can do it I can do it.

Basically, Dwight put on about 40 pounds of muscle since joining the Orlando Magic, making him one of the most imposing big men in the league. He followed these simple routines—and more—to attain his goal of a stronger physique.

Just because you’re “skinny” doesn’t mean you have to stay that way—Dwight didn’t—and you don’t have to either!

Additional Reading on GenXXL

• Breaking Down Men’s Fitness: “25 Ways to Get Stronger Now”
• TRX Strength and Conditioning Is a Brees
• NBA: 2010 Anti-Awards

Photo by Rene Schwietzke

I love stirring the pot — it’s this little thing I do. So, when considering how to wind up the end of the NBA season I couldn’t just give awards. Everyone gives out awards.

No, I wanted to recognize the mediocrity and failures in the NBA. So often we take up all our time annointing the Most Valuable Player, but what about the Least Valuable Player?

Some guys — Kobe, Tim Duncan, Chauncey  — were meant for success. Others were not. Some guys can make an impact — Kendrick Perkins, Leandro Barbosa, Derek Fisher. Others cannot.

Today we honor those who simply are not successful, don’t live up to the hype, make bad decisions, are bad teammates or just suck. I think you’ll especially enjoy the award for sucking.

So, without further ado — The General’s 2010 NBA “Anti Awards.”

Worst Management

Photo by Keith Allison

…and the award goes to. It’s a tie! Danny Ferry and LeBron James!  Come on up gentlemen. Here’s the Cleveland Cavaliers‘ superstar and their General Manager.

Ever since LeBron became the superstar that he is, the Cavs have given total control of the team to him. Sure, Danny Ferry — come here and give me a hug buddy — has been acting as the General Manager, but he only approves the deals LeBron wants.

Boys, you get to share this award because you put together the 2009-2010 Cavaliers. You had the best record in the league; you were everyone’s favorite to represent the East in the Finals; and you crapped out.

LeBron, your desire to have a “winner” like Shaq on your team sure didn’t work out for you, did it? Your team was a little more than eight points worse every game with Shaq on the floor.

Danny, it’s your job to tell LeBron that Shaq had help winning his four rings. That help was named D-Wade, Kobe, D-Fish and Phil Jackson.

For your bad ideas, willingness to act on those ideas, and a misunderstanding of the game’s history, you clearly deserve this year’s Anti-Award for Worst Management.

Worst Performance by a Superstar in the Playoffs

Photo by Keith Allison

…and the award goes to.  Another tie!  LeBron James and Dwight Howard!  Come on down gentlemen!  The two best players in the Eastern Conference – neither of whom will be in the NBA Finals.

LeBron and Dwight, you both gave into Rajon Rondo. In fact — come out from backstage, LeBron. Don’t be shy — Rajon Rondo is probably the new best player in the East.

How’s that for a reversal of fortune, huh LeBron? Who would’ve thought his Rondo’s time at Kentucky would actually help him?

Since you both got beat down by the same guy in two different series, and both of you stopped trying halfway through your next-to-last-loss, you both deserve this award. What a coincidence you’re out here again, LeBron.

Dwight, didn’t you learn anything from losing to the Lakers in the Finals last year? We were so proud of you when you watched the Lakers celebrate after totally “owning” you in the Finals.

Today, we can only acknowledge that you allowed your team to send away Hedo Turkoglu and replace him with Vince Carter.  Didn’t LeBron tell you that he makes all his team’s personnel decisions?

You need to get on that next year, Dwight.

Let’s give them a hand!

Most Embarrassing PDA

…and the award goes to…Ohio Governor Ted Strickland. Come on up while we watch your winning entry.

Need we say more Governor? You’ve made a complete fool of yourself over someone who hasn’t been to the NBA Finals since 2007, when he accidentally won the Eastern Conference.

Let’s give the Governor a hand!

Least Effectual Player from a 2009 Finals Team

Photo by Slawek

…and the award goes to…Marcin Gortat.  Come on down Marcin.  Hobble that Nike Swoosh tattoo up here and pick up this award.

Marcin, you were such a great fill-in for Dwight Howard last year. You made such a great name for yourself that your Nike tattoo became front page news when you wanted to sign with Reebok.

3.8 points last season and 3.6 points this season have never seemed so different. You made yourself into “trade bait” after last year’s Finals loss.

This season I don’t think we could get one team to admit your 3.6 points per game are attractive. Good job NOT following up a career-making year with a better one!

Marcin Gortat everybody!

Worst Tank Job

Photo by Keith Allison

..and the award goes to. The New Jersey Nets! You gave up after your first game and banked solely on Jay-Z having a minority share of your team — so you could land LeBron.  Come on down so we can honor your pathetic state.

Mikhail Prokhorov, come on down too. You’re the proud owner of this disgusting franchise!

You went 12-70. You lost 7 of your last 10 games this season. You’re hoping to use Jay-Z’s 1 percent to get LeBron — after you move to Brooklyn.

You fired Lawrence Frank for doing nothing with — nothing! You hoped that sucking the whole year would get you the first pick in the lottery and you ended up with the 3rd pick. No frozen envelopes here!

Now you have to pick Derrick Favors — you know, the kid from Georgia Tech who totally wasn’t worth the hype?

New Jersey Nets — you gave us — by far — the worst tank job this season. Congratulations on setting your franchise back at least 5 more years!

Give them a hand everybody!

Least Valuable Player

Photo by Keith Allison

…and the award goes to…Antawn Jamison! Come on up Antawn, Antoine, we don’t know how to say your name!

You were supposed to be the “missing link” for the Cavs this season, and you couldn’t come through. You only averaged 32 minutes a game and 15.8 points in your stint with the Cavs.

We know you can only do so much, but shouldn’t the “missing piece” play more minutes and be on the floor with LeBron more?  You weren’t very effective were you? Kinda makes you wish you were still in Washington, doesn’t it?

By the way Antawn, we suggest that you hold a press conference and tell us how to say your name. If we give you another award, we want to get it right!

Thank you all for attending the 1st Annual NBA “Anti-Awards.” Enjoy the completion of the NBA Final between the Los Angeles Lakers and the Boston Celtics.

Additional Reading on GenXXL

• NBA Gossip: Does LeBron Have a Way “Out” of Cleveland?
• NBA: “Nothing but Ten” Rumor Edition
• NBA: Nothing but a Rematch

Photo by RMTip21

We need to start with two things:

1.  I’m a Laker fan.

2.  I honestly believe what I’m about to say to be true—it’s not just because I’m a Laker fan.

I think the Boston Celtics are harboring an internal conflict. I’m not saying they aren’t a great team—they are a fine basketball team.

The only problem is that they have come about their greatness with a suspicious amount of ego. Every player in every professional sports must have a healthy ego, but the Celtics’ players take it too far.

The odd combination of unneeded ego and an average coach has led to this conflict, which could possibly sink them in the NBA Finals. This conflict could cripple their franchise for years to come if they aren’t careful.

What conflict? Just stick with me and you’ll see that there’s more the Celtics than Green and White.

Prelude to an Internal Conflict

Photo by Keith Allison

When Kevin McHale colluded with Danny Ainge to send Kevin Garnett to the Celtics from Minnesota it made the Celtics into an instant contender. It took Doc Rivers from the brink of being fired to title-winner.

When the Celtics landed Ray Allen—the clutchest shooter in history—that simply made them that much better. It also made Doc Rivers look even better than he really is.

Now, the team had beaten down the cute, little SportsCenter “Three Amigos” commercial, won a championship, and restored Celtic pride.

Paul Pierce then announced that he was the best basketball player in the world. The team got over-confident and couldn’t get past the Magic last season.

The whole time the “Three Amigos” thought they were the only reason the Celtics won a championship. At least you can say more than that for Kobe—he knows he’s been on both sides of the “superstar coin.”

Now they have to contend with age and the idea that someone else on the Celtics is “leading” the team. They are playing great basketball, but they aren’t honoring their teammates—actually, one teammate in particular.

The Conflict

Photo by Eric Kilby

KG, Paul Pierce, and Ray Allen are having a hard time dealing with Rajon Rondo leading the team. Of course, this suggests that the “Three Amigos” fail to understand that, as their Point Guard, that’s his job.

Rondo distributes the ball, pulls down rebounds and runs the offensive sets. I could go with rumors that Paul Pierce dislikes Rondo because Rondo doesn’t run plays for him.

I could go with rumors that Ray Allen doesn’t feel like he gets enough shots because Rondo handles the ball too much. I could go with rumors that Garnett feels like he’s occasionally left out because he’s not as quick as he used to be.

I’m not going there. The bottom line is that the “Three Amigos” think they own this team when none of them is the best player on it.  They want to have complete control—and that desire for control will kill this team.

In short, they hate Rajon Rondo for taking over their team.

How Do I Know This?

The funniest evidence for my theory lies in an interview ESPN did with Kevin Garnett. After the Celtics finished dismantling the Cavs in the 2nd Round of the playoffs, Kevin Garnett opened his mouth and gave me all the ammunition I needed:

“You have to understand that chemistry is a hard thing to come by. All year we’ve been dealing with chemistry problems. You know, [Rajon] Rondo, he’s getting better and we’re fitting him in. At some time he’s going to take this team over and that was a big adjustment for us. But he’s a great addition to our team. I think the chemistry is starting to be sound now and we’re playing firm basketball.”

He’s a great addition? You’ve been working on chemistry all year. You’re “fitting him in?” He’ll take over this team “some time?” Doesn’t this sound like the “Good Old Boys Club” and Rondo isn’t invited?

News Flash to the “Three Amigos”:  The best player on the Boston Celtics is Rajon Rondo.  He’s been dragging your team through the playoff. You have no right to “fit him in” when he is running the point the way he is.

Garnett is talking about the same person who went for 29 points, 18 rebounds and 13 assists in a Game 5 win against Cleveland. Yeah right KG, you’re just “fitting him in.”  You guys have been “tweaking” the offense. T-W-E-A-K-I-N-G. I get it now.

Those are the words of an insecure superstar who lucked into a championship and all-of-the-sudden thinks he’s Bill Russell.

Mr. Garnett. My Daddy knows who Bill Russell is, and you sir, are no Bill Russell.

The Result

Photo by Yzukerman

Of course, for me, this is partly “wishful thinking,” but I believe we’re about to come to a crossroads. Rajon Rondo has taken over the Celtics, but he’s about to do it on a national stage with the whole world watching.

He will lead the Celtics to at least two victories in this NBA FinalPersonally, I think the Lakers will win the title 4-2. Both of the victories for Boston will be led by a supreme act of basketball heroics from Rondo.

Boston’s 4 defeats will feature the “tweaking” Kevin Garnett has been doing. The only problem is that Rondo won’t be able to fit three hotheads into the offense all at the same time and frustration will set in.

Pierce will be upset that Rondo doesn’t feed him the ball enough. Kendrick Perkins will get in on the action and get his “real” 7th Technical Foul and be suspended a game.

Garnett’s knees will show their age as Pau Gasol and Lamar Odom continually run around him for easy baskets. He’ll blame Rondo—internally—for his problems and all hell will break loose.

We’ll see the real difference between Phil Jackson—a man with 10 titles; and Doc Rivers—a guy who got saved by a bogus trade. Sure, the Lakers landed Gasol for nothing, but they didn’t trip on that 2009 title—they had to earn it after losing to Boston in 2008.

Boston’s entitlement will get in its own way. Larry Bird never thought he was entitled to anything, nor did Bill Russell. This version of the Celtics feels entitled to a ring.

While Rondo sets them up for 6-8 years of success with a solid Point Guard the “Big 3″ will resent Rondo’s rise to power.

And every second they spend feeling entitled or resentful, Pau Gasol and Lamar Odom will run over Garnett and Perkins—redeeming themselves after being humiliated in 2008.  The Lakers are taking this one home—with some help from a bitter Celtics squad.

Payback’s going to be a bitch in Boston.

Photo by Dan Fornal

The Atlanta Hawks, a 50-win team, and the Cleveland Cavaliers, who have the best record in the league two years running, both fired their coaches this week.

Mike Woodson got his walking papers right after the Hawks got swept by the Magic. He improved his team every year for 5 years and still got the boot.

After winning Coach of the Year last year, Mike Brown got fired because his Cavs fell to the Celtics in the 2nd Round of the playoffs. He won over 120 games in two seasons and he gets canned.

I have my theories on these firings, which we’ll get to.

However, the real questions are: Who did you fire your coach for?  And, who are you going to bring in to “wow” me if I’m a Cleveland or Atlanta fan—which thank God I’m not!

I know who everyone wants to be their “Knight in Shining Armor” and then I know who will really get hired. Let’s look at our options . . .

Bring in an Offensive Genius

Photo by Keith Allison

Everyone is thinking the same thing, “Since LeBron is so great—how come Mike Brown can’t do anything with him?” The answer is obvious. There’s nothing TO do with him.

The Cavs let Mike Brown hang out to dry for a week while giving LeBron more time to lobby for what he wanted. We know that NBA coaches matter, however, players matter too.

Wouldn’t it be nice if Mike Brown could just wave a magic wand and make the Cavs offense “click” in the playoffs?  Yes. Is that going to happen? No.

What if you brought in Rick Carlisle? Maybe he’s going to flame out in Dallas because Dirk Nowitzki wants to opt-out of his contract. You could give LeBron Larry Bird’s “Offensive Coordinator” from the Pacers’s Finals run!

Will that really change anything? Do we honestly think Rick Carlisle is a killer like LeBron is? No, we don’t.

You could woo Alvin Gentry or Mike D’Antoni. I mean, look how great D’Antoni did with the Knicks this season (29-53).  LeBron needs that, right? Nope.

There’s got to be somebody who can get LeBron’s juices flowing. Perhaps Larry Brown. He took Allen Iverson to the Finals and won a title for Detroit. Or did Iverson take Brown to the Finals and Rip, Chauncey, Sheed, Ben Wallace, and Tayshaun win Brown a title?

Bring Hubie Brown out of retirement!  He made Jason Williams into “White Chocolate!” Nope, LeBron isn’t an under-achiever.

There’s no one you can hire to fix an offense that won over 120 games in two seasons—not even Phil Jackson. Hell, he probably thinks their offense works just fine.

And if Jackson did try to teach the Cavs the “Triangle and Two” it would probably take a year of growing pains to get it right. Firing Mike Brown will not fix Cleveland’s offense.

Bring in Someone to Knock Some Sense into These Knuckleheads

The Hawks have some major slackers on their team. Joe Johnson doesn’t want to be “the man.”  Josh Smith jacks up ill-advised 3′s like a strung-out Kindergarten teacher slams tequila shots on the first day of summer break. Marvin Williams plays like he’s still at UNC.

The Hawks played uninspired basketball against Orlando in the 2nd Round of the playoffs.  Joe Johnson even admitted it saying,“That doesn’t bother me, and I hope it doesn’t bother anyone in this locker room. “It’s about us in this locker room. We could care less if [fans] showed up.”

What else do you need to know?  They don’t care!  They need a hard-ass coach to come in and kick them in the pants. Wait, Mike Woodson IS a hard-ass. Larry Brown wouldn’t be a change of pace—especially since Woodson used to be Brown’s assistant in Detroit.

Bring in Hubie Brown!  He made Jason Williams, a notorious under-achiever, into “White Chocolate.”

This is true, but the difference is Jason Williams cared. Joe Johnson, Josh Smith, and Marvin Williams don’t care. Do we really think Hubie has time for that crap?  He is 76!  In the immortal words of Sgt. Roger Murtaugh “I’m too old for this s***!”

His great-grandkids are probably better behaved.

What about Avery Johnson. He whipped the Mavs into shape and got them to play defense!  There’s a couple problems here:

1.  Avery is 5’11.” Do we really think Josh Smith and Joe Johnson will respect some little dude?

2.  They probably have no idea he even played basketball—and won a championship in San Antonio.

3.  You see the pattern. I’m wasting your time with the list. This won’t work.

Just Hire an Assistant and Be Done with It!

And do what? Hope that you just promoted the next Phil Jackson?  What are the odds that Phil Jackson was going to be “Phil Jackson?”  1,000,000 to 1.

Hiring an assistant is great, but that’s what Mike Brown and Mike Woodson were before they got the jobs they just lost!  You might as well rehire them if you’re going to use an assistant to replace them.

It sounds like a smart move—hoping for the Phil Jackson effect—until you re-read my previous point.  You already hired an assistant and then fired him when he didn’t live up to elevated expectations. Maybe you should give them more time.

Look at Frank Beamer. He’s been at Virginia Tech for 23 years. He’s nearly won a national title, won 6 conference titles, and is consistently competitive. What the hell else could you ask from him?

Do you want him—or Woodson or Brown, for that matter—to go to the end of the rainbow and wrestle the pot of gold from a leprechaun?

You might as well ask them to do that, because this isn’t getting any easier.

They Are What They Are

Photo by Dan Fornal

The Hawks and the Cavs are what they are. They have good players, but they don’t have all the right players in the right places. Who’s fault is that?  Danny Ferry‘s in Cleveland. Billy Knight’s in Atlanta.

Yes, I still blame Billy Knight for this mess in Atlanta.

Danny Ferry is getting a pass because he was a two-time All-American at Duke and took them to the Final Four in ’86. Can we please get over this? He’s clearly over-matched trying to build a team around LeBron.

Billy Knight got fired a couple years ago and the Hawks are still suffering because of his poor management. He let Chris Paul AND Deron Williams get away.

However, no one is acknowledging this. Danny Ferry traded—stupidly—for Shaq and Antawn Jamison.

Shouldn’t they bear the blame for this mess? Shouldn’t LeBron ask for a better GM? He already asked for a new coach.

This carousel will continue until Dan Gilbert in Cleveland, and the 7-headed monster in Atlanta, realize they did this to themselves. They fire the coach for the general manager’s sins.

Maybe Mike Brown and Mike Woodson will get jobs with smart GMs that result in championships. That would be poetic justice.

Additional Reading on GenXXL

• NBA: Nothing But a Rematch
• NFL: The Selfish and the Heartless
• Sports Podcast — Week 9

Photo by Wendy

Lakers’  Head Coach Phil Jackson has a way with words. He’s the “Zen Master.” He makes a living getting in people’s heads.

How else can someone coach Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, and Shaquille O’Neal to a combined 10 NBA titles? Those 3 egomaniacs certainly can’t do it all by themselves.

Since Phil convinced Michael to share, convinced Shaq to stand under the rim, and convinced Kobe to acknowledge his team, that must mean he can do anything—right?

It doesn’t help that the Phoenix Suns are playing the Lakers in the Western Conference Finals—and their star player isn’t American—he’s Canadian.

What does this have to do with anything?  Stay with me . . . you’ll see!

The Comment

Photo by Keith Allison

Phil told an ESPN columnist, “Am I crazy, or am I the only one that heard [the Legislature] say, ‘We just took the United States immigration law and adopted it to our state?’”

He then followed that one up before Game 1 with:

“I’ve been involved in a number of progressive political issues over the years and I support those who stand up for their beliefs. It is what makes this country great. I have respect for those who oppose the new Arizona immigration law, but I am wary of putting entire sports organizations in the middle of political controversies. This was the message of my statement. I know others feel differently, even in the Lakers organization, but it was a personal statement. In this regard, it is my wish that this statement not be used by either side to rally activists.”

Just let it soak in for a minute. It seems like he doesn’t know what he believes—but I can assure you that he does.

The Backlash

Photo by Flickr user Keith Allison

As soon as Phil said that he didn’t want his comments used to “rally the troops,” they were used for that purpose anyway. He’s the most famous coach on the planet—of course those words were going to be everywhere!

You had him saying out of one side of his mouth that he supported the law and another side saying he was denouncing it. Phil put himself in the middle of a mudslinging match.

What’s funny is that he diverted attention for the Suns wearing “Los Suns” jerseys to protest the new law.

Phil Doesn’t Really Care that Much

Photo by Keith Allison

Everyone wants to take this to the extreme. Phil isn’t an extreme person. Have you ever watched his locker room talks? Ever seen a video of him in a timeout? He’s laid back and he does his job well.

Anyone who thinks Phil is far to one side or the other is crazy. He doesn’t care about this law that much.

He may find it uncouth. He may find it appropriate. But, he certainly isn’t losing sleep over it. Phil cares about one thing—winning.

He knows how to do that. He knows basketball. He’s won 11 NBA titles—as many as Bill Russell—and we think he gives a flip about a stupid governor in Arizona and a stupid immigration law?

To him, that’s what it is—stupid. But, it’s also an opportunity.

What Does It All Mean?

Photo by Keith Allison

I don’t claim to be a mind reader. I can’t judge the intent of Phil’s comments with 100% accuracy, but I do know that he is a professional “mind game player.” He knows Steve Nash is Canadian.

He knows that if he chimes in on the subject he’ll have the best player on the Suns—Nash—thinking about his own “non-American-ness.”

That’s it. It’s that simple. I think Phil realized he could get at the Suns in general—and Nash specifically—by addressing an issue that has nothing to do with him.

Can you imagine the evil laugh he cackled?  The second he realized Nash would be sitting at home saying, “Which is it Phil!? Pick a side!”

Steve Nash has come out and called the law “misguided.”  Now he thinks Phil Jackson is misguided. Do you think Steve Nash looks at Phil with a little more disgust now?

You bet he does!

Phil Jackson Is a Genius

You don’t win 11 NBA titles—10 as a coach—by accident. Phil knew that this hot-button issue would be on the minds of the Suns’ players for the entirety of the Western Finals.

He seized an opportunity and decided to throw a little gameplay out there. You know the best part?

Phil was asked if it’s hard to prepare for Steve Nash and he said: ”Yeah, because you can’t carry the ball like he does in practice.” Then Phil made a motion like he was palming the ball. “You can’t pick that ball up and run with it.”

Nash had already laughed that one off, only to have Phil later come out with his opinion on immigration. That’s the master stroke of an evil genius right there.

Now Steve is sitting at home saying, “You don’t support immigrants AND you’re saying I carry the ball? OH HELL NO!”

Steve Nash is pissed—just like Phil wanted him to be.

Will this Equal Wins for the Lakers?

Remember, I said that the only thing Phil cares about is winning. The rumor isn’t: “Phil Jackson messed with Steve Nash’s head.” The rumor is: “Phil Jackson messed with Steve Nash’s head and the Lakers are scoring 120 points a game on the Suns.”

I know it is really subtle and you may not even believe me, but please trust in this: Phil Jackson is the “Zen Master.” He won’t leave any stone unturned.

His team is a calculated machine that feeds on opportunity. If Amar’e Stoudamire is in a bad position—Lamar or Pau takes him to the hole.

Steve Nash needs to be held back—put Derek Fisher on him to tire him out. On the other end of the floor, D-Fish isn’t doing a lot and Nash falls asleep.

This formula is not fool-proof. The Lakers lose games—they’ve lost games in these playoffs.

Phil made comments about Kevin Durant’s play, and Durant got mad. That’s just enough anger to open a door for the Lakers.

Phil sees the immigration issue, remembers Steve Nash is Canadian, sees the “Los Suns” jerseys . . . .

And,an opportunity is born!

Additional Reading on GenXXL

• Sports Podcast — Week 9
• NBA Western Conference Great Eight Fate
• NBA: “Nothing But Ten” Rumor Edition



Photo by Adam Pieniazek

The Orlando Magic and Boston Celtics face off in the Eastern Conference Finals.  Though they both are playing quite well, this is a piece about rematches.

Orlando beat Boston last year in the Conference Semis on their way to the NBA Finals.  If all goes as planned, the Magic will play a “rematched” NBA Finals with the Lakers, when all is said and done.

“But the Celtics are playing so well,” you say. The Celtics are playing well, but they don’t have an ace-in-the-hole.

“But the Magic got blown away in last year’s finals with a better team,” you say. The Magic are better now than they were last year.

As much as I hate to admit it, the Magic adding Vince Carter was smart. Not overpaying Hedo was smarter. Keeping Gortat around was smart. But when your Senior VP has written 50-something books and has 19 kids — you know he’s a smart dude.

How do the Magic win with this new-look team, and what’s the exception to my theory?

The Celtics Have Rajon Rondo

Photo by Eric Kilby

Rajon Rondo put on the show of his life in Game 4 of the Eastern Conference Semifinals. In that one game, he posted 24 points, 18 rebounds and 13 assists. That’s staggering for a point guard who plays with “The Three Amigos.”

However, Rondo didn’t just become the “4th Amigo.” He became “The Man,” in Boston. That entire team depends on him.

KG, Allen and Pierce have to go through Rondo to get things done. Only Ray Allen can shine on his own and that’s only because he can still shoot.

Rondo is the “X Factor.” He can swing an entire game with his scoring, rebounding and passing. The only problem is everyone else could get in the way.

The Celtics should be busted after having to win three-in-a-row against Cleveland — even if LeBron quit in Game 5 and most of Game 6.

The Celtics are old, and even if they are clicking now, they would have to win eight games to win an NBA Title again. I just don’t see that happening.

But The Magic Have Dwight Howard

Photo by Keith Allison

Leading the league in Field Goal Percentage. Check. Defensive Player of The Year. Check. All Defensive 1st Team. Check.

That’s Dwight Howard in a nutshell. Plus, he’s been to as many NBA Finals as these Celtics have — one.

However, D12 comes with his flaws. He basically lost the NBA Finals in 2009 because he couldn’t hit free throws.

I even heard his Senior VP, Pat Williams, say that Dwight would be scary IF he were a 75 percent free-throw shooter. Too bad he isn’t.

There seem to be a lot of “ifs” and “if onlys” and “what abouts” with D12. I like him. He seems like a nice guy. He can clearly play, but maybe there’s something missing.

Perhaps the same thing LeBron is missing?

For all his gifts, there’s something that is Dwight’s Achilles heel, but it won’t kill him now. The Celtics are up nine at halftime of Game 1 as I write this, and free throws had nothing to do with that.

But The Celtics Like Fouling — Alot

It’s true that the Celtics are good at fouling. It’s also true that Vince Carter can’t take hard fouls. If you hard-foul Vince once a game, he’s out mentally for the duration.

If you put in Scalabrine to foul D12 hard five times, then you’re getting somewhere. This is pretty much Boston’s only major edge.

Rondo can only do so much, and Ray Allen can only hit so many turnaround 3s. If the Celtics want to win, they have to foul and foul hard.

There’s only on problem — you run the risk of getting called for everything. Once you set the precedent that you’re “hacking” someone, the officials might call you for every little thing.

Now where are the Celtics without a hard foul?

The Magic Are Smarter

At the end of the day, the Magic are smarter than the Celtics. Sure, they’re also younger and fresher, but they’re smarter than that.

They’ll spend a game and a half figuring out what to do — after that it’s over.

They’ll find a way to shield Vince Carter from hard fouls. They’ll find a way to funnel the ball to Howard so he can improve on his field goal percentage.

Oh, and they’ll foul Paul Pierce and Kendrick Perkins hard. Both are hurt, and Pierce is older than dirt.

The Magic had the 2nd-best team in the league this season. Yes, I put my Lakers 3rd, but they’re playing the best of anybody in postseason up to this point.

IF they’re as smart as I think they are, they’ll improve on last year. I don’t know if they can win a title, but they can win the East.

It only remains to be seen if they can get hotter as the postseason drags on. That’s what the Celtics did in 2008 — likewise with the Lakers in 2009.

They only prove my point if they dramatically improve as they move forward.

My Prediction?

Photo by Keith Allison

Magic in 6. Notice I’m making it hard on my Lakers. I don’t want to see the Magic in Finals again, but who else am I going to pick?

If this were my “Get the Lakers another title” column, then I’d pick the Celtics — who won’t be able to keep up another series from now. I don’t want this to be hard for the Lakers, but I have to be realistic.

The Celtics have now defeated the Magic in Game 1, 92-88. The game wasn’t even that close, but that doesn’t mean the Magic are sunk.

Remember how I said they were smarter? They’re just now figuring out what to do, and by halftime of Game 2, they’ll be in their stride. Stan Van won’t let this beating happen again.

Just because the Celtics seem to be peaking does NOT mean they got spontaneously younger. Rondo’s not enough when has three old geezers to hand the ball to.

The Magic will win Game 2 at home, lose Game 3 in Boston, get pissed and steamroll through the next three.

Will that be too much energy spent before the Finals? Only time will tell.

Additional Reading on GenXXL

• NBA: The Right Seed Helps Playoff Chances Grow
• Do Any NBA Teams Have the Luxury of a Break?
• The General’s 5 Key NBA Games: Stop the Skid

Photo by Kevin Ward

The two worst sports towns in America are Cleveland and Salt Lake City. They’ve earned this dubious honor for completely different reasons, but they both deserve it.

You could argue that Atlanta with its fair-weather fans or Kansas City, which is pure haplessness, are worse, but they don’t hold a candle to Cleveland and Salt Lake. Nothing can be as bad as what I’m about to describe.

On one hand, we have a city that seems to have the wrong expectations, the wrong ideals and the wrong perspective. On the other hand, we have a city where “dreams go to die.”

What’s the difference? Well, they don’t have many dreams in Salt Lake City.

Warped Perceptions in Utah

Photo by Keith Allison

The Utah Jazz got smacked around by the Lakers in the 2nd Round of the Western Conference playoffs. However, that’s not what intrigues me.

Being intrigued that the Lakers kicked the crap out of a hobbled Jazz team is NOT news. The news is in a guy who used to play in Utah—only now he’s drawing boos.

Derek Fisher was drafted with Kobe Bryant in Los Angeles. He spoke so beautifully of fighting against Kobe in 1-on-1′s when they were young players. He learned how to play the game with Kobe.

Well, when D-Fish got old and the Lakers were crumbling, he was let go and landed in Utah.  He filled the role, but never did anything serious for Utah. In fact, his 3 rings were the only thing he brought to the Jazz.

Then Derek Fisher had to deal with unspeakable terror. His daughter was diagnosed with a rare form of eye cancer. He asked the Jazz to send him to a city that had a hospital capable of handling his daughter’s care.

The Jazz sent Fisher—almost as a favor—back to the Lakers. However, they were not the juggernaut Lakers, and not the “selfish Kobe” Lakers. The Jazz had no idea that Chris Wallace would trade Pau Gasol straight up for a flaming pile of dog crap, or that Kobe would learn to share the ball.

Derek Lied?

Photo by Donielle

So, D-Fish goes back to L.A. The Lakers get Pau Gasol and Lamar Odom, and Kobe learns to be “the man.”  They make two straight finals and win the 2009 title.

When Derek Fisher returns to Utah this year and he finds himself booed by the fans in Salt Lake. In fact, many news outlets ran a photo of two women wearing shirts that read “Fisher Lied.”

Huh?  Derek Fisher lied? How, I ask you?

Apparently the folks in Utah need more oxygen—must be the heights in the Rockies. By saying that Derek Fisher lied and booing him, the people of Salt Lake City are saying:

1. Derek Fisher is a clairvoyant
2. Therefore, he predicted the stupidest trade in history—Gasol for Kwame Brown
3. Then, he wished his cancer on his own daughter so he could go back to L.A. where she could receive adequate medical care, and
4. The state of Utah is entitled to a championship.

Derek Fisher basically won the 2009 NBA title for the Lakers. The only problem is, he sucked the whole year until he hit those two 3-pointers in Game 4. The Jazz are not entitled to good luck—they just aren’t.

No wonder John Stockton and Karl Malone couldn’t pull it together. Combine Jordan with unreasonable entitlements and you get the 1997 and 1998 failures during the finals.

Salt Lake City sucks because it thinks highly of itself when it has no right to. You don’t get to boo Derek Fisher and you certainly can’t expect Malone and Stockton to beat Jordan and Phil Jackson.

That’s just stupid. That’s what they are—unintelligent sports fans. At least fans in KC and Atlanta know better.

Cleveland, Where Dreams Go to Die

Cleveland—home of LeBron, the Indians, Bernie Kosar, and no titles in 46 years. LeBron just flamed out of the playoffs. Travis Hafner hasn’t lived up to expectations. Cliff Lee and C.C. Sabathia left the Indians. And, the Browns stink worse than a plumber’s hairy butt crack.

Bernie Kosar has the Browns on the brink of going to the Super Bowl and then—”The Drive.” The Indians have the best pitching staff in baseball—then they trade Lee and Sabathia for less-than-equal-value.

LeBron stopped caring about midway through the 2nd half of Game 4 against Boston. The Cavs are now contemplating firing Mike Brown because LeBron couldn’t get it done against an ancient Celtics club.

Cleveland is a place that can only hold up Jim Brown as an icon. It can only look to the 1964 NFL Championship that the Browns won during the “pre-Super Bowl era.”

LeBron didn’t just have to be “the man,” but he also had to keep the dream alive in Cleveland.  It’s not anyone’s fault—Cleveland just invites the death of dreams.

LeBron is an amazing player, but his dreams can’t be fulfilled in Cleveland. He can’t save a city that eats dreams for breakfast. Do you really think having the Indians as the subject of “Major League” was a mistake?

The Worst Thing Is a Brat

Photo by Keith Allison

LeBron looked completely disinterested as his Cavs lost to the Celtics. He raised his hands after every missed shot, flashing a look as if to say, “What just happened here?”

You take LeBron’s “it’s easy to pick on me when I’ve had 3 bad games in 7 years” and combine that with the desperation of Cleveland fans and the result is utter failure.

They invited yet another big shot to the team and he broke their hearts. It’s as if they didn’t know any better. Maybe it’s time for Cleveland fans to let the dream die altogether.

Perhaps they can learn the passive apathy of Atlanta fans. They can learn to make BBQ like they do in Kansas City. Maybe they could even take up a hobby—they used to make nooses in Boston and they invented “quitting your team” in Chicago.

What’s the Worst that Could Happen?

Photo by Dan Fornal

Salt Lake has unreasonable fans, but they haven’t called for Jerry Sloan‘s job. This shows that they know he is a good coach, as well as a valuable asset to the franchise.

Sure, they booed Derek Fisher, but they’re just dumb. Dumb isn’t enough, though. Heck, half the fans in L.A. don’t know the first thing about sports—they go for the show.

Cleveland fans—they just invite misery. They should know that they will be crushed. I never thought LeBron could win a title in Cleveland. I even posited that Kevin Durant is the “heir apparent” who can win multiple titles in OKC.

If Bernie Kosar couldn’t beat John Elway, Jim Thome couldn’t beat the Marlins, and two Hall of Fame pitchers get traded—you’re in hell. H-E-Double Hockey Sticks!

Utah, at the very least, has an air of realism. They probably knew they couldn’t beat Jordan’s Bulls, so they got mad and stayed that way.

The fans in Cleveland don’t know left from right. They let Bernie Kosar hurt them, Sabathia quit them, and LeBron flame out on them. Yet, they still want LeBron to come back.

The winner of the #1 worst sports city in America is Cleveland. Not only can they not get out of their own way—they like pain.

Now they’ll bang themselves on the head with rocks for a couple months hoping LeBron will stay—as if he’s the answer.  You’re cursed . . . permanently!  Get over it!

Additional Reading on GenXXL

• King James MVP Crowd Favorite
• NBA Gossip: Does LeBron Have a Way “Out of Cleveland?
• Durant to Dunk Kobe, LeBron

Photo by Keith Allison

Rajon Rondo led the Boston Celtics to a 2-2 tie in their 2^nd Round series with LeBron’s Cavs. If the Cavs are so great, then why are they having a problem with a team filled with geezers?

Every time I turn around, I hear about how the Cavs are the best team in the league — but now they are playing with fire against Boston.

I think LeBron is looking for an out. He needs a reason to leave Cleveland so he doesn’t have to be the bad guy.

Remember, his mother bought him a Hummer with a loan based on his earnings potential — while he was still in High School! Image is everything to this guy.

I’m not one for starting rumors, but I believe I’ve figured out LeBron. He’s an egomaniac who wants everyone to like him.

He craves attention, but lacks the killer instinct. He needs help but isn’t willing to acknowledge it.

LeBron, I’ve got a therapy regimen for you before my discovery gets too far in the press.

Get Over Thine Self, King James

Photo by Flickr user Keith Allison

LeBron James is one of the most self-absorbed athletes I’ve ever seen. It’s not so much his play on the court — he has to play big because the rest of his team is average — as it is his antics before the game.

The funny “picture-taking” during warm-ups and his “chalk throw” are all just silly. It would be much better if he just held up a sign that said, “Look at me!”

I think what’s most disgusting about his behavior is that it’s completely disingenuous. He has no personality.

We rail on Tiger Woods for being a “corporate creation,” but LeBron is no less “corporate” than Tiger.

We can claim that Tiger’s marriage to Elin was a “corporate pairing,” but LeBron is no less contrived.

Do you think HE came up with the “chalk throw?” Do you think HE decided to start screwing around during warm-ups?

LeBron has a marketing team in place that is working his image constantly — remember the Hummer. He has to look good all the time. He has to be “cool” all the time.

Not once has LeBron ever acted like a man when it counted. He doesn’t take warm-ups seriously — which is unprofessional. He wouldn’t shake D12’s hand after the East Finals in 2009 — which is unprofessional.

He says the right things in interviews, but it all sounds scripted.

I want to hear you come out and say, “My team sucked tonight,” or, “I was awful tonight,” not, “Rondo was great.” Notice how the attention was deflected in a bad situation.

Rondo won, but LeBron didn’t lose? George Carlin once said, “Can’t we silence these Christian athletes who thank Jesus whenever they win and never mention His name when they lose? You never hear them say, ‘Jesus made me drop the ball’ or, ‘The Lord tripped me up behind the line of scrimmage.”’

This is no different. LeBron wins for the Cavs, but never loses? Even Michael Jordan admitted that he was “trusted” with the game-winner 26 times and missed.

Art Thou a “Big Baby”?

Photo by Keith Allison

LeBron is so absorbed in his image that he’ll never come out from under his own shadow. He’s outshone himself—badly.

He created a behemoth. Combine that “behemoth” with his ego and you have someone who is chasing his own tail, chasing an impossible standard, and doing so without humility.

He’s such a child, he cannot admit his own weaknesses. He hides behind everyone’s “6’8,” 280” overtures. He feeds on that adoration.

Why does he do the “chalk throw”— because he needs to. He needs people to think he’s cool. He’s the dude who never went five seconds without a girlfriend — because he needed to be cool.

He’s the guy who can’t have a bad night. Imagine what he thinks to himself:

“I’m perfect. I’m LeBron. I’ve been coddled my whole life. I couldn’t have been bad. He must have just been really good.” That’s why he doesn’t have the “killer instinct.”

He’s deathly afraid of failure. He’s deathly afraid of being imperfect. I want to say he sounds like a broken person, but it’s his own fault for not owning his imperfections.

So, on the outside, it sounds like sportsmanship, but on the inside it’s avoidance. Yep, I said it. LeBron is a child trapped in a 6’8” 280 lb. frame.

Come To The Light My Son

In my opinion, nobody truly respects LeBron. They all know the things I’ve said — deep, down inside — and are just afraid to admit it.

The shame is, he’s an incredible player. I want to pull for him, but I can’t.

LeBron is a baby. He’s unprofessional. He’s a great player, but he’s an ego-maniac. He’s been coddled his whole life. He’s a “corporate monster” just like Tiger.

LeBron, you can earn my respect. Stop this madness. Stop me from thinking you’re an authentic “Big Baby.”

Be a man and stop hiding. Admit to us that you aren’t perfect. Admit that your team isn’t good enough and you need help. Admit that you’ll be done at 30, if you have to keep playing like this.

When Rajon Rondo beats your ass just say, “He was great, and I should have been better. I let him beat me.” It reminds me of Gil Grissom, “I had him, and I let him get away!”

Stop chasing your own tail. Stop trying to live up to your own stupid expectations. Just play basketball and let the chips fall where they may — then own where they fell because of your play.

Take Away Thine “Out”

Photo by Keith Allison

Sign an extension with Cleveland, right now. Don’t wait. Don’t hover. Don’t hold your future over the heads of the fans in Cleveland. Those people deserve better than that.

Don’t negotiate. Take the max contract and be done with it.

Do we really think stringing along long-suffering fans like folks in Cleveland is even remotely cool?  If I were a Cavs fan, I’d be so pissed right now.

If you’re staying—stay. If you’re going—tank it. The only thing worse than losing the Finals to the Lakers is winning it all and having LeBron leave.

You might as well just stab everybody in Cleveland in the chest if you’re going to do that.

You brought up this “elbow injury.” You don’t have any help. You could easily say, “My teammates didn’t step up, so I’m outta here!”

You could easily say, “This team can’t get me enough players” and bolt. You haven’t addressed the situation, so I’m left to believe that you intend to leave.

We can speculate all we want, but if he really wanted to commit to Cleveland—he would have already. The contract would have been signed in October or November.

There’s too many ways for LeBron to leave and be the “discriminating athlete looking for a Championship.”  I don’t buy that. You play for the love of the game or don’t play at all.

You aren’t entitled to a championship. If you think you are—then move out of the way.

That includes you LeBron!

Additional Reading on GenXXL

• NBA: Nothing but “I’m Not a Hater”
• Sports Podcast — Week 7
• Durant to Dunk Kobe, LeBron

Photo by Rene Schwietzke

The NBA is filled with the kind of intrigue that is befitting a James Bond novel. The league also has a way of creating villains and heroes — without consulting the players, of course.

There are some rumors floating around the NBA that are funny. Some are salacious, and some are downright diabolical, in nature.

Every time the league opens a door for one player it closes a window for another. Then that player’s team starts to resemble street-urchins-in-hoodies. Paint one coach as a “bad seed,” and the whole team takes a PR hit.

When did the NBA become a “spy game?” It isn’t just a player taking “questionable photos” — we’ve got potentially crooked refs.  LeBron James as hero/villain/hero; Dwight Howard as the crybaby, and a commissioner who plays favorites.

Somehow the league can get the right combination of players on the right teams to make drama happen. The NBA shed its “thug” image, but it replaced “thugs” with villains of their own design.

Who’s up first?

10-7  Sheed, The Nuggets, Mark Cuban and Larry Brown

Photo by Keith Allison

The NBA wants you to believe that Rasheed Wallace is a menace. He was there for the “Malice at Palace,” and he’s got a rap sheet the size of “War and Peace.”

After all, who wouldn’t despise a guy who has 25 career ejections, 313 career technical fouls and 6 career flagrant fouls? The NBA is betting you won’t.

We always forget that Sheed came to the Pistons and was “the final piece” in Detroit’s “Championship Crown” of 2004. We forget the same way we forget Mark Cuban resurrected the Dallas Mavericks.

Cuban bought the team, changed their business model, and they haven’t missed the playoffs since 1999. I’ve blasted the Mavs — and Mark Cuban — for messing up their own mojo, but he’s still a better owner than Michael Jordan.

Just as the NBA would have you believe that Cuban is too involved — or that he eats babies — they would also have you believe that the Nuggets are heartless dirtbags.

Denver’s coach, George Karl, is fighting cancer, and the Nuggets lost in the 1st round of the playoffs.  Everyone on the planet is dogging them about not “rallying around their coach.”

There are folks who want you to believe the Nuggets don’t care, so they wouldn’t want you to see this story from Hoopsworld. Travis Heath details how “the players [he] spoke with …became emotional when talking about their head coach.”

Dirtbags? More like confused and emotional guys who are having a hard time dealing with their feelings, who got beat by a legitimately good Jazz team.

Then there’s another brand of dirtbag — Larry Brown, or so they’d have you believe. He’s had 13 coaching jobs in his career and he’s actually coached two teams–Spurs and Clippers–in the same season.

Who would we be without coaches to hate?  Too bad no one has a problem with their nomadic friend who moves a lot—you call him “eccentric”.

Allen Iverson has issues with Brown and Brown is the jackass.  Brown coaches up a very young Bobcats team this season and Michael Jordan might not want him around because Brown has a history of being a “jacksass”.

Maybe Larry just needs a hug? “No, he’s a jerk. You can’t do that!” See, the NBA has already infiltrated my column

6-4 Joakim Noah, The Bulls, and John Paxson

The “incident” between Vinny Del Negro and John Paxson after a Bulls game with Phoenix has it all. Del Negro and Paxson were fighting over Joakim Noah.

Paxson had put a limit on the minutes Noah could play as he recovered from an injury. Del Negro was trying to win games so he wouldn’t get fired. Noah wants to play because he’s the ultimate competitor.

We’ll never know who the “instigator” was. Why? Because John Paxson was going to fire Del Negro anyway. David Stern thinks that John Paxson must be viewed as a playoff hero for the Bulls. If Paxson is anything other than the game-winner in the ’93 Finals then the league might collapse.

You see, the league carefully crafted Paxson as the hero-turned-executive. This heroic image went to Paxson’s head and he acted out. The league never leaked the details, so I have to assume Paxson was the aggressor.

Meanwhile, Vinny Del Negro was a marginal NBA player who lucked into playoff runs in 2009 and 2010. That’s what works for the league.

Actually, Del Negro took the Celtics seven games in the best First Round Series ever played in 2009. Then he got his team back to playoffs after he lost Ben Gordon to Detroit, and Noah for part of the season.

Joakim Noah is a convenient villain for the NBA. He plays in the East. He clashes with pretty boys like LeBron, KG and Paul Pierce, and he’s outspoken.

How could the league let him be anything but a villain? Conveniently overlooked, are his 2006 Final Four MOP and two National Titles. He’s the firecracker on a young team with potential.

Yet the only thing I can find are stories about how much everybody hates Joakim Noah. You think that isn’t by design?

#3  D12=Crybaby

Photo by Keith Allison

Dwight Howard got fined $35,000 for criticizing officials on his blog. D12 is in the wrong place at the wrong time. He’s competing with LeBron James for the title “NBA Hero”—and he’s losing.

David Stern had already anointed LeBron when he walked across the platform with the #1 Cavs Jersey. How can Dwight compete?

And before you say that LeBron doesn’t complain, he doesn’t have to. He gets all the calls. LeBron gets to be the upstanding citizen, and D12 gets to be the crybaby that can’t make free throws.

Nevermind that Tim Donaghy looks more right everyday, and Howard is right to be upset about the calls he’s taking.

Take Dwight Howard off the Magic and they win 20 games—max. He’s the first person to lead the league in rebounds and blocks in consecutive seasons. However, he finishes 4th in MVP voting.

As soon as he missed those free throws in the Finals last year he sealed his fate. The league decided he’s the crybaby who can’t make free throws. It’s unfair, but true.

2.  Kobe Looks Fruity

Photo by Keith Allison

Then Kobe Bryant goes and does a photo shoot for L.A. Magazine where he looked—fruity. That’s the way my mom would put it.  Keep in mind that I’m a Laker’s fan, but the man has a shawl on his head. A SHAWL!

Kobe seems to be on David Stern’s “Wheel of Fortune.” Sometimes Kobe becomes the jerk — rape allegations covered to the hilt; he’s selfish because he has no one around him — but the man wears a shawl on his head and there’s not one word spoken about how wrong this looks?

I can assure you that if Joakim Noah took those pictures, everyone on the planet would accuse Noah of being gay — for the record I believe he’s straight.

So why the “protection?” Kobe and LeBron have puppets — D12 and Noah don’t. Kobe and LeBron is a sexy match-up — no one liked Kobe v. D12.

If you think David Stern doesn’t have his hands all over this, then you haven’t been paying attention. The league steers PR where it wants. You can’t have people accusing Kobe of being gay right before he could meet LeBron in the Finals.  You just can’t.

1.  LeBron James

Photo by Keith Allison

David Stern wants LeBron to stay in Cleveland — yet this is somehow ok. Stern talked before Game 2 of the Celtics/Cavs second round game:

“Hopefully he’ll stay. That’s the way it should be … It allows teams to keep their own players.”

He doesn’t get to say that, does he? If you’re the boss, don’t you have to be impartial? He gave the Cavs leverage with LeBron, and everyone missed it.

Now, when they’re at the table, the Cavs can say, “David Stern wants you here; you don’t want to disappoint him, do you”.

And we all know that disappointing Stern means you’ll have a disappointing career. It’s not that LeBron got preferential treatment — it’s that the Cavs got preferential treatment.

He didn’t want the Sonics in Seattle so he let them move. He wants the Cavs in Cleveland, so he’s doing them a favor.

Kobe may not be “fruity,” and John Paxson might not be an amateur boxer. Larry Brown might be a good guy; Sheed might be a great player, and Mark Cuban might be the best owner in the league.

Those rumors don’t sell. The NBA LIVES on rumors. They propagate them every day. I could write this column every week, and it would always be something new.

That’s how LeBron gets to be the “King” and Joakim Noah is a jackass.

If there’s one rumor that’s always true in the NBA it’s this: David Stern started it.

Additional Reading on GenXXL

• NBA: Who Let the Softies Out?
• Durant to Dunk Kobe, LeBron
• NBA Western Conference Great Eight Fate

Photo by Aaron Vasquez

An interesting thing is happening in the Western Conference playoffs.  The San Antonio Spurs–excuse me, the old-decrepit-on-their-last-leg Spurs–downed the Dallas Mavericks like it was no big deal.

How can a relatively young team like the Mavs lose to a team stuck in middle age?  Everyone had their money on Dallas at the beginning of this season and now that money is being wasted.

We could go back to the 2006 NBA Finals.  The Mavs lost that series to the Heat after being up 2-0 and leading in the 4th Quarter of Game 3.  However, I don’t think that’s the problem.

The Mavs have much deeper issues than a playoff loss.  They believe their own hype, they think they’ve risen permanently from their own ashes, and they love to say “Luxury Tax.”

Who let the softies out in Dallas?  Let’s blame a few people/things for the atrocity that is Dallas’ “playoff disaster.”

Dirk Pits Himself in a Hole

Photo by Keith Allison

We keep saying that Dirk is one of the best players in the league.  We keep saying he’s a “7-foot wonder.”  He can shoot the 3, take it to the rack, and play defense.

Dirk has gotten into the bad habit of believing his own hype.  He plays the game with a little less “verve” than is required.

He’s taking the same attitude that has kept the Lakers from sweeping the Thunder.  They take games off.

You can’t tell me that a dude who is 7-feet tall can only muster a career average of 8.5 assists per game.  He isn’t crashing the boards and his numbers demonstrate that.

This same “7-foot wonder” only averages 2.7 assists per game over his career.  You can explain that away with the “Steve Nash effect,” but after Nash left for Phoenix, Dirk should have stepped up his game.

I know that he isn’t a Point Guard, but he certainly isn’t playing like he’s the best player on his team.  He’s got Jason Kidd distributing the ball–which is very helpful.

However, Dirk must not be driving the lane enough if he only has 2.7 assists per game over his career.  Or, he never passes once he makes an inside move.

Don’t you think that he would be kicking the ball out for more assists if he were driving to the basket?  Dirk’s playing “Zydrunas Ilgauskas” and taking too many outside shots.  He isn’t creating offense–he’s taking offense.

This explains his lack of rebounding–not enough inside play.  This explains his lack of assists–too many trips inside without a pass.  This doesn’t explain him never averaging 40 minutes a game in his career.

If you’re the best player on the team, you need to stay on the floor.  Some of that should be blamed on the coach, but part of that is Dirk needing to be taken out due to his own weakness.

Dirk is the best player on his team, he doesn’t create enough offense, and his numbers don’t indicate toughness.  He’s easily to blame for Dallas’ woes.  One could even say he’s “derelict” in his duty.

Rick Carlisle = Wrong Place, Wrong Time

I think there’s a reason that Rick Carlisle got fired in Detroit. There must have been something about him that made the Pistons want Larry Brown more.

Larry Brown has had 13 jobs since he started in coaching. You could put his picture next to “unreliable” in the dictionary, but the Pistons fired Carlisle to get Brown.

Rick Carlisle was Larry Bird‘s “offensive coordinator” in Indiana when the Pacers got killed in the Finals by the Lakers.  This proved Carlisle’s offensive prowess, but not his leadership ability.

Carlisle took the Pacers to the NBA’s best record, but couldn’t close the deal in the playoffs. He then went to Dallas.

The problem is that Dallas already had offense.  They had just fired Avery Johnson for coaching “too much” defense, and threw Carlisle into a pressure cooker.

Now Carlisle has to come to an offensive team to fix something that isn’t broken.  Clearly, at this stage, his idea of offense and the team’s are clashing.

Carlisle’s leadership ability–or lack thereof–is being tested because expectations in Dallas are high.  He’s never been a “successful” coach, and Mark Cuban doesn’t mess around.

The combination of those things would make any coach jittery, and most coaches ineffective.  Rick Carlisle’s personality and “lack of success” are dragging down the Mavs.

Some of these players have got to be thinking, “This guy can’t handle this” while Carlisle is thinking, “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! What do I do?” That’s enough to make you lose to a middle-aged San Antonio team any day of the week.

Mark Smokes More than Cubans

Mark Cuban is outspoken, but definitely has his heart in the right place.  He wants the Mavs to be good and he wants to do right by the fans.  I can appreciate that. However, he’s so outspoken that it distracts from the team–a very fragile team.

If Mark Cuban were Kobe’s, MJ’s or LeBron‘s owner, it wouldn’t matter.  They have enough personality to outshine him. Dirk doesn’t have that kind of personality.  Add to that his lack of toughness and you’ve got a real problem.

Cuban also likes to say “luxury tax.”  That’s his rallying cry for  spending money to make the team better.  However, it hasn’t resulted in a title, and that 2006 Finals loss comes back to haunt them again.

Mark Cuban has resurrected the Mavericks, but he can’t take center-stage.  He criticizes officials, pisses off everyone around him, and makes the Mavs an easy target.

If you were a player on the Mavs wouldn’t you just kind of throw up your hands?  Personally, I’d say, “What the hell is the difference?  He’d complain even if we did win.  No one will respect us anyway, AND I’m getting paid.  Eff it all!”

So, Who Let the Softies Out?

Photo by Keith Allison

Mark Cuban let the softies out.  He fired Avery Johnson for coaching defense.  He let Steve Nash go.  He allows Dirk to play soft.

Cuban cries about the “luxury tax,” but hired an offensive coach for a non-defensive team.  Cuban pisses off everyone in the league–even people he pays.

His attitude will result in a locker-room mutiny that Rick Carlisle doesn’t deserve.  Oh, and his attitude has half the officials in the league gunning for his team.

That 2006 Finals meltdown against the Heat is the evidence, but the culprit is Mark Cuban.  His “trigger finger” needs a lock and key, because he’s already shot too many people as it is.

Cuban made his team the pariah–and they may never be able to wash that label off.